monkey spanking

masturbating

I was lying there spanking my monkey while I watched a porn video

by AntUK January 23, 2003

Spank Vision

Watching porn on the computor or TV

Perry is watching Spank Vision and playing with the Clit Commander again

by Edwardo1 January 10, 2009

Spank Bank

The part of the brain where the male mind stores images for later self-gratification.

One guy: "You see that honey's booty?"
Second Guy: "Yep! It's goin' in the spank bank."

by CleverinDenver March 12, 2009

spanker

Someone who claims to know something about anything but in reality is only a half-witted chronic masturbator who wishes to impress with their ever-so-lameass limited knowledge in a vain attempt to cover-up their double-digit IQ, usually resorting to Wikipedia in desperation.

Troll: "i know everything about quantum mechanics, evolutionary biology, general relativity, and medicine because I read it on Wikipedia".

Zoe: "spanker"...

by zoe28 November 7, 2009

Spank Mag

When a dude jacks off, he either watches some porn/magazines or he looks at his spank mag.

a spank mag is like all these visions in your head of hot action you've seen, or people you know or have seen that you can totally picture naked or in some sort of sexual fantasy and this is what you choke your chicken too.

every guy's done it but this is the actual word for it

spank mag is commonly used if you see a hot chick you yell "SPANK MAG!" this means u can totally picture this chick naked and totally wanna wack to it

"Dude, i was checkin out my spank mag last night and your mom was in it bro, and she was totally suckin my wang..."

(hot chick walks by) "Dude, this chick is TOTALLY goin in my spank mag."

by alecisaplaya March 5, 2009

brand spanking new

the quality of an item recently manufactured and/or purchased a short while ago and without showing any marks, scratches or other defects.

The terminology derives from the obsolete practice of spanking a newborn human on the back immediately after birth to stimulate breathing.

Yep. Just drove it off the lot and it is brand spanking new.

by ekks September 24, 2010

Spankability Scale

A scale (usually 1-10) by which to judge a woman's beauty. The unit of measure being the likeleyhood or frequency that you will masturbate to fantasies of her.

That chick is so fucking hot, she's definitely a 10 on the Spankability Scale!

by LtcOliverNorth May 7, 2003