by pogg fish January 08, 2021
by pixelsundae February 10, 2020
The Babel fish is small yellow and leech-like, and probably the oddest thing in the Universe. It feeds on brainwave energy received not from its own carrier, but from those around it. It absorbs all unconscious mental frequencies from this brainwave energy to nourish itself with. It then excretes into the mind of its carrier a telepathic matrix formed by combining the unconscious thought frequencies with nerve signals picked up from the speech centres of the brain which has supplied them.
The practical upshot of this is that if you stick a Babel fish in your ear you can instantly understand anything said to you in any form of language. The speech patterns you actually hear decode the brainwave matrix which has been fed into your mind by your Babel fish.
Now it is such a bizarrely improbable coincidence that anything so mindbogglingly useful could have evolved purely by chance that some thinkers have chosen to see it as a final and clinching proof of the non-existence of God.
The argument goes something like this: "I refuse to prove that I exist," says God, "for proof denies faith, and without faith I am nothing."
"But," says Man, "the Babel fish is a dead giveaway isn't it? It could not have evolved by chance. It proves that you exist, and so therefore, by your own arguments, you don't. QED."
"Oh dear," says God, "I hadn't thought of that," and promptly disappears in a puff of logic.
"Oh, that was easy," says Man, and for an encore goes on to prove that black is whte and gets himself killed on the next zebra crossing.
Most leading theologians claim that this argument is a load of dingo's kidneys, but that did not stop Oolon Colluphid making a small fortune when he used it as the central theme of his best selling book 'Well That About Wraps It Up For God'.
Meanwhile, the poor Babel fish, by effectively removing all barriers to communication between different race and cultures, has caused more and bloodier wars than anything else in the history of creation.
The practical upshot of this is that if you stick a Babel fish in your ear you can instantly understand anything said to you in any form of language. The speech patterns you actually hear decode the brainwave matrix which has been fed into your mind by your Babel fish.
Now it is such a bizarrely improbable coincidence that anything so mindbogglingly useful could have evolved purely by chance that some thinkers have chosen to see it as a final and clinching proof of the non-existence of God.
The argument goes something like this: "I refuse to prove that I exist," says God, "for proof denies faith, and without faith I am nothing."
"But," says Man, "the Babel fish is a dead giveaway isn't it? It could not have evolved by chance. It proves that you exist, and so therefore, by your own arguments, you don't. QED."
"Oh dear," says God, "I hadn't thought of that," and promptly disappears in a puff of logic.
"Oh, that was easy," says Man, and for an encore goes on to prove that black is whte and gets himself killed on the next zebra crossing.
Most leading theologians claim that this argument is a load of dingo's kidneys, but that did not stop Oolon Colluphid making a small fortune when he used it as the central theme of his best selling book 'Well That About Wraps It Up For God'.
Meanwhile, the poor Babel fish, by effectively removing all barriers to communication between different race and cultures, has caused more and bloodier wars than anything else in the history of creation.
by Douglas Adams' Ghost February 18, 2005
Beach patrol code name for black person at a beach who you automatically assume can not swim. Usually travel in large groups which then would be called a school of rock fish. Can be heard from far away due to lack of normal access to beaches and overbearing excitement of the beach. Commonly used when black person is present around any body of water.
John: hey keep an extra eye on those people over there.
Rick: oh you mean the school of rock fish
-or-
Dad: how was the beach today?
Me: horrible had to go in after the same rock fish like five times cause he fell off his boogie board
Rick: oh you mean the school of rock fish
-or-
Dad: how was the beach today?
Me: horrible had to go in after the same rock fish like five times cause he fell off his boogie board
by haterade294 July 23, 2009
by scabpalace June 14, 2010
The Fish-Bulb comes from the Simpsons. There's an episode where Homer sees a Japanese commercial for dish detergent, with "Mr. Sparkle", their mascot. The logo looks like Homer. When asked for an explaination, the company sends a tape. The tape demonstrates that the logo was generated by blending a fish, and a lightbulb.
There's your answer, Fish-Bulb!
by neoikon August 27, 2003
Prisoner 1: "That new white boy in the shower."
Prisoner 2: "Leave him alone, man."
Prisoner 1: "Hell naw! Fresh Fish on the line!"
Prisoner 2: "Leave him alone, man."
Prisoner 1: "Hell naw! Fresh Fish on the line!"
by Jerremy Deane November 24, 2003