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John

This dumb ass who is gay and homo and gets guys until things get nasty.
Let’s do it “john pulls down pants” never mined.
by Bossmode403 October 1, 2019
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King John

A King John blow job. While the woman is giving head the man sucks his thumb, pulls his ear, and only pauses to occasional to say 'Mama'.

This is a niche act, generally only preformed by balding firemenand lesbian in denial.
She was giving a King John to Tony but was distracted by thoughts of Dame Judy Dench.
by Bunkerite March 27, 2023
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John

Hey look at that john getting surounded by girls
by anonymous October 12, 2022
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john arnolding

Have sex with a girthy penis so hard the banjo bleeds
I John arnolded last night with betty
John arnolding
by Kellogg's s March 31, 2015
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johning

Making excuses before a game start. Originated from a person named John who made a lot of excuses
"My friend started johning about controller issue before our 1v1 started"
by BigManStickmanDan December 8, 2024
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John Minatree

Pure Awesomeness Radiating from a central system of amazing talent and sexyness!
Person #1 - Hey have you met the new guy?
Person #2 - YEAH! He Is Such a John Minatree!
by partyboy2009 March 29, 2010
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John F Kenedy

Man plays too many video games, you’ll never believe what happens next... John F kenedy

(Brad is playing video games in white kitchen. Enter Amy)

Amy: Honey, are you still playing that game?

Brad: Yeah, I’m on level 56. Now go away, you’re distracting me.

Amy: Brad, I just got this letter from my doctor. I have nose cancer!

Brad: Gross! I’m divorcing you, but not until my games over.

(Later. In parking garage, Brad enters with suitcase. He sees a Rolls Royce.)

Brad: WOW! That’s an expensive car! I’ll bet the guy who owns that is super rich.

(Amy exits the car.)

Brad: Amy! But, but how...?!

Amy: You see, after you told me you were leaving me, I stole this car to teach you a lesson. So you see, you can’t leave me if you’re dead!

(Amy jumps back in the car and runs Brad down. She gets out and leans over his crumpled body as he dies.)

Amy: So you see, there was no nose cancer, you were the cancer all along.

(Fade to white)

Dhar Mann: Hey Dhar Mann Fam! I hope you liked that message about why you should play too many video games and piss off your wife. Remember, we’re not just sharing videos, we’re changing lives!
by Hitlers dead son April 11, 2022
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