cooter beard

A cooter beard is a mustache/goatee combo that connects and resembles a 1970s vagina, crudely referred to as a cooter.

In an disturbing grooming trend, more and more men are sporting the cooter beard.

by Navinger March 06, 2020

Bearded Stranger

When a woman sits reverse cowgirl style on the face of a bearded man, making it impossible to see anything but his beard. His nose may or may not end up in her butthole.

I had fun being her bearded stranger last night.

by bkmon3y April 30, 2014

Johnson Beard

Pubic hair that has grown longer than one's right thumb.

Dude, my Johnson beard looks like the Amazon jungle during the summer

by Mr. handfart January 10, 2011

zombie-beard

A combination of zombie apocalypse and neck beard. It it well known that neckbeards are obsessed with the collapse of society, so they fantasize about some kind of apocalypse. The thing is that most neck beards are either extremely over or underweight there for extremely unathlectic, so in the extremely unlikely events of an apocalypse they will most likely be the ones to die first for obvious reason. I’ll give them credit that they usually know a lot about survival, but that’s about it. There are three main reasons why they have this mindset.
1) They don’t have the social skills to fit into normal society

2) There are no marriage laws so they can force a fair maiden to court them and be some kind of white knight
3) They think their gonna be Rick Grimes from the Walking Dead or maybe even a Daryl, but in reality they’re most likely a Eugene

4) They think they will somehow out live all the athletes and chads
In the end why the hell would anyone want anything a horrible as some kind of apocalypse to happen. I mean seeing all your loved ones get eaten and die that’s just plain awful.

Yes people like this actually exist
Zombie-beard: I’m so ready for the apocalypse I have all my katanas and machine guns!
“Chad”: How will you outrun them? You’re 300lbs?
Zombie-beard: I won’t run like a coward I’ll kill them all! You ignorant simpleton!
“Chad”: Whatever man.
*zombie outbreak*
“Chad”: Oh shit! Run!
Zombie-beard: *gets eaten* AHHHHH! NO! THIS IS NOT HOW IT TURNS OUT IN MY THE WALKING DEAD FAN-FICTIONS MAGGIE WAS SUPPOSED TO LEAVE GLENN FOR A REAL GENTLEMAN LIKE MEEE!!1!
Maggie: Who is that guy?
Glenn: No idea

by Thequeenofbasicbitchery October 28, 2017

Ass Beard

A hairy butt crack. When someone bends over and their butt crack is showing with massive amounts of hair.

Whoa dude check out that ass beard over there.

by Spiffy McGee October 15, 2008

Bum Beard

The hair growing on the cheeks of your ass, around your ring.

My bum beards so long I could dreadlock it

I shaved my balls, gooch and bum beard last night

by Rob_uk April 12, 2006

snatch beard

Where a woman shaves her pubes but hair still runs down the pussy lips.

Mary's pussy was well maintained, but her snatch beard was fucking disgusting.

by Littlewillystrap March 01, 2009