Cardon

An unexpected erection or heightened sexual tension aroused via travelling in a car.
This awkward disposition can occur regardless of family members or sexually unattractive friends, pets or even nobody at all. It is brought on by boredom, which leads to thoughts of sex. Vibrations of the road cause friction within the loins and stimulate the minds lust for love.

A cardon can be applied to the following situations; travelling via flight, rail or boat.

A cardon nearly always occurs at an inappropriate moment, usually at the end of a journey or at a moment when you are expected to leave your seat.

The car park was busy, but there was a large space outside the restaurants main entrance. Everyone I knew was braving the cold winter breeze just to welcome us to my mother’s 50th birthday party. She was so surprised to see so many people and climbed out the car with such gusto. The rest of my family, including our dog Lucy rushed to the excited crowd. Moments later they were all looking over to the car, wondering if i was about to surprise my mother with another birthday prank, perhaps?
The driver asks me, "Are you not getting out mate?"

"I can't, I've only got a frickin Cardon!"

"Just put your head back against the seat sir, I'll sort it."
He climbed out of the front of the car, removed his hat and solemnly told my family that I was dead.

Example 2

Delivery van turns up at the front door. An excited young man rushes down the path.

"Have you got my new tv?"

"Yes."

"Well may I have it?"

"Not yet mate. Got a bit of a carndon situation."

by lomosapien December 26, 2011

cardboard ass

Sidney Smith

She has an ass as flat as a piece of cardboard. Call her cardboard ass

by #1 Roast Session May 21, 2016

Cardio vascular hepatitis z

Its a disease from bramble Bush , when you do a 360 no-scope and say "ha ha , yh man" then get tea bagged by the bramble , then it gives you the disease which makes you retarded and think you are a hot air balloon

One day , in the land of fairy's , a young boy approached an odd shaped bramble bush , then he approached it and had a sneek insight , with force the persuasion of the bramble Bush dragged in the young boy and made him do a certain amount of out of the ordinary kind of stuff , which then led him to having Cardio vascular hepatitis z.

by Adolfhitlersrealdad-11 November 18, 2017

fasted cardio

A form of tourtue to ones self upon waking up out of bed in the morning. Preformed on an empty stomach, breakfast is served after "fasted" cardio.

Nick named "Hardio"

Girl 1: Did you get your fasted cardio in this morning?

Girl 2: Hell yeah! Got up at 5am this morning.

by The_mastaa October 28, 2015

building a cardboard fort

A euphamism for having sex.

Person: Want to go build a cardboard fort? (winks)
Other Person: Hell yeah!

Person: What were you up to last night?
Other Person: Oh you know, just building a cardboard fort. (winks)

by Shuggy Doo September 4, 2012

cardiocracy

Democracy in physical action. when you 'vote with your feet', or whenever free-expression about politics involves walking or running or pushups.

This caucus is pure cardiocracy!

by Mark Zatopek February 17, 2006

cardiofuck

The process of opening a person's chest in some way (examples: Knife, axe, saw, etc.) and then removing their heart through a process of your choosing (example: Cutting it out, Tearing it out, Pulling it out, Chewing it out.) and then proceeding to have sex with the heart, preferrably using the holes in the atrium or ventricles. This can be performed on a living or dead person or other subject that has a heart, including animals.

"The Mortician was sent to prision for cardiofucking over 100 of his female cadavers."

by Thebreadedninja September 29, 2006