Douche Canoe

Someone who has exceeded the level 1 douche, level 2 douche bag, and graduated to level 3 of the douche pyramid

Did you see that guy Sonny slide into the random girl's DM asking her to ride his cock?
Yeah I did. Spicer is such a douche canoe

by Unknown Urban Dictionary User June 27, 2017

Douche

(adj.) classification applied to a person, or group of persons, who intentionally exhibit behaviors and/or make statements without care for others. Several divisions of the "douche" exist. 1. Selfish douches, who act and speak with only concern for their own needs, desires, and wants; 2. Righteous douches, who believe their actions are sanctioned by a higher power; and 3. Retributive douches, who purposely act in such a way to inconvenience selfish and/or righteous douches.

That guy who parked in two spaces is a douche!
Yes, but that guy who parked 3 inches away from the two space parker's driver's side door is my kind of douche!

by jewellstudent February 28, 2014

runaway douche

A guy who willingly ends friendships for his girlfriend, then begs for forgiveness after they break up.

Mike met Sarah and became a runaway douche.
Asshole douche ditcher

by Minus5885 September 21, 2015

douche bag

A person who shuns the use of sleeves and regards bottle openers as a poor substitute for slamming beers bottles on kitchen tables

It's 20 below and Zach still refuses to sew those sleeves back on his sweatshirt...what a douche bag

by Rytoc December 7, 2007

Snazzy Douche Muffin

Very similar to a Cheeky Dick Waffle, but leaning more toward 'douche bag' or 'needs to be punched in the throat' than 'clever'.

Westborough Baptist Church supporter: "Well, I think those children needed to die. It's a SIGN FROM G-

Random guy in the back of room: Oh, shut your whore mouth, you snazzy douche muffin. No one asked for your opinion.

by Leyulf September 30, 2013

typical Willies douche

A typical willies douche is someone who works at willies and does not correlate with anyone else but the willies cult.

Any worker their is a typical willies douche.

by Qwertymanguy December 1, 2022

douche pontoon

A person achieves this maximum level after evolving from the form douche canoe. Only the douchiest of douche canoes can obtain this legendary final form. Proceed with caution, because standing close to them for long periods of time is more legal than bathing in nuclear waste.

Ohhh my god! Tabitha has evolved into the final form of a douche pontoon! Run for your life!!

by PaulieD13 May 9, 2017