A person who insists on talking or texting but doesn't provide any meat to the conversation, thus wasting your time.
John: "I'm so fed up with Teresa; she's a total phone vegan."
Conversation of a phone vegan:
Teresa: Hi.
John: Hey, what's up? How have you been?
Teresa: Nuthin. Good.
John: ... That's good. What did you want to talk about?
Teresa: Idk.
Conversation of a phone vegan:
Teresa: Hi.
John: Hey, what's up? How have you been?
Teresa: Nuthin. Good.
John: ... That's good. What did you want to talk about?
Teresa: Idk.
by Captain Battletoads, Ph.D. December 13, 2012
Get the phone veganmug. by human i think February 3, 2023
Get the spirit phonemug. by Klinkhammer November 22, 2017
Get the razer phonemug. Person who talks loudly on phone around a captive audience (i.e. In an elevator, a train, dorm room, or other group setting) and says ignorant, obnoxious, or simply TMI kinds of things.
In a dorm, late at night:
Your room-mate on the phone: "Don't worry dude, you didn't know you had (horrendous STD) before you started dating her, if she breaks up with you over that, she's just not the one."
You text your friend: "My room-mate is a total Phone-douche!"
All the while you cover your ears under your blanket imagining smashing his phone/asking God what you did to deserve this.
Your room-mate on the phone: "Don't worry dude, you didn't know you had (horrendous STD) before you started dating her, if she breaks up with you over that, she's just not the one."
You text your friend: "My room-mate is a total Phone-douche!"
All the while you cover your ears under your blanket imagining smashing his phone/asking God what you did to deserve this.
by sprstix409 January 28, 2012
Get the Phone-douchemug. A functional mobile cellular communications device that is cobbled together from various random, unusable or even un-related components.
Shit, man. That new iPhone costs over a grand! $250 hot or off the Dark-Net...Looks like I get to keep my Chinese Franken-phone 'till those prices drop to reasonable.
by YAWA February 12, 2020
Get the Franken-phonemug. Small silver block that characters on detective television shows,all the CSIs, and "House" pull out of their pockets when the writers can't get off the bong long enough to come up with a better plot device. This cube magically give the characters the next surprising clue which allows the story to dangle or move to its surprise ending, depending on how close to the end of the hour it is. See DNA EVIDENCE
Plot direction:
Caruso:I'll see you in hell/jail/syndication.
(reach into pocket for cell phone) Caruso (pause, adjust glasses, or draw back sport coat to get good handle on waist). I'm coming in.
Peripheral Snarky CSI Staffer: Who was that?
Caruso: They found-the murder weapon/killer/a time slot for CSI Des Moines.
Caruso:I'll see you in hell/jail/syndication.
(reach into pocket for cell phone) Caruso (pause, adjust glasses, or draw back sport coat to get good handle on waist). I'm coming in.
Peripheral Snarky CSI Staffer: Who was that?
Caruso: They found-the murder weapon/killer/a time slot for CSI Des Moines.
by Pantaloon January 12, 2008
Get the cell phonemug. The head phones one uses to masturbate with. Usually used to keep the pornographic sounds from entering other's ears that are near.Are usually covered in semen.
Guy #1 Hey why are these headphones so sticky?
Guy #2 Oh yes, those would be my jizz phones.
Guy #1 *Throws headphones*
Guy #2 Oh yes, those would be my jizz phones.
Guy #1 *Throws headphones*
by guy # 2 August 6, 2010
Get the Jizz Phonesmug.