cooked books

(n.) Incorrect accounts, where the values of work done is understated so that income taation is lower. Could also mean exploiting loopholes, which isn't illegal. See also cook the books

Sorry, Terry. He got caught putting his signature on cooked books and he had to fire him.

by Kung-Fu Jesus July 21, 2004

home cooking

As a desperation move, the act of hooking up with a member of one's own group of friends because of inability to close with any new girl or guy.

Adam went for some of Caroline's home cooking after striking out at the bar last night.

by home cooker February 6, 2012

cooks branch

When you suffer severe pain from an injury to the balls.

"Mike got kicked in the balls by someone the other day. Worst case of cooks branch I've seen."

by gobbler945 October 6, 2023

Pressure Cooking

The act up squeezing your dick in class without your hands, so you can satisfy yourself in secret.

Friend: Dude, why are you so relaxed all the time.
You: Because, my day includes regular acts of pressure cooking
Friend: What!?
You: You Know, I squeeze my dick between my legs to satisfy myself.

by gooeylooey November 20, 2016

cooking off

exploding, blowing up

He described the propane tanks cooking off during the fire as sounding like bombs exploding.

by stilllovesfilm November 10, 2007

Cook the Duvet

Flatulence released under the covers with the sheets and duvet pulled tight to avoid the release of the stench.

I decided to cook the duvet before Rachel came to bed. When she pulled the sheets back to crawl in a massive waft of ass stench greeted her nostrils.

by Dick Onchin December 29, 2020

Monster Cook

Something your friends trick you into searching and now you have some weird porn on your computer

Hey Timmy, search up monster cook you'll get a pirate movie!

by anonymous June 10, 2017