cigar smoking trumpet player 

1. When a man asks his woman to lie down whilst he places his testicles in her mouth and asks his woman to perform hand-job on his penis. The man then asks his woman to hum creating a vibrating sensation on the balls. This bring great pleasure for the man. The man then asks his woman to close her eyes, the woman knows she is in for surprise. The man takes a drag from his pipe. While holding in his smoke the man excretes feces on his woman's face and exhales the smoke in the same general area. This creates the illusion of a cigar smoking trumpet player.

Jon Nguyen: My woman is cigar smoking trumpet player
Chi Voung: Wow how you get woman to be so tarented?

cigar smoking trumpet player by KimYongEel December 6, 2009

Golden Trumpet 

When a guy goes down on a girl and she queefs and pisses in his face.

It comes from the original term a "Trumpet", where the girl only queefs in the guys face.

Friend 1: "I heard that Jeff and Clara broke up last weekend."
Friend 2: Yeah, he broke up with her when she gave him a golden trumpet."

Golden Trumpet by jimmybuckets May 3, 2009

BROWN TRUMPET 

Extended loud farting.

After an eclectic mix of burritos and sushi-Bill treated the passengers in his car to a most pungent and audible concert
featuring his BROWN TRUMPET.The window locks were applied.

BROWN TRUMPET by L.MARTIN January 29, 2006

Fuck Trumpet 

A person who is not only a stupid, ignorant asshole, but who also shouts their small minded, and often dangerous rhetoric loudly and proudly.

"Only consort with people of your own colour, then you can be a completely racist, ignorant, bigoted, intolerant, sociopathic fuck trumpet just like me!!!"

Fuck Trumpet by XenonSmash June 7, 2016

Did i step on your trumpet? 

A saying which implies that there was no intent to offend someone. Made popular by psychedelic pop group Danielson on the album Ships. Can also be used when one is unsure of whether or not harm was done by an offhanded comment.

Jerry: Oh I know I hated those kids, in fact I hated anyone who had a pony growing up
Manya: I Had a pony
Jerry: Sorry, did I step on your trumpet?

that would've saved Manya.

Did i step on your trumpet? by rocktopuss February 23, 2006

Muffle Trumpet 

When performing the act of anal sex and the receiver lets loose an ass cannon (aka fart)

I was totally banging Nicks sister the other nite and she let loose a savage muffle trumpet.

Muffle Trumpet by Mitchy Cock and Balls October 18, 2008

Funnel Trumpet 

A fart released when shitting or just sitting on a toilet, that emits a thunderous sound, usually staccato, due in part to the natural spreading of the arse cheeks when enthroned.

A skilled funnel trumpeter can control a sustained funnel trumpet note by using sphincter control and circular anal breathing techniques.

The bloke in the cubicle next to me was blasting the funnel trumpet a moment ago, I could barely contain my laughter.

Funnel Trumpet by Peado Bear December 3, 2010