two shits to a candlestick

to not know anything about anything

to "not hold two shits to a candlestick" is to think you know something but really know nothing

Dan: did you hear caleb's thoughts on obama care?
Emma: yeah, but the tool can't hold two shits to a candlestick when it comes to the goverment

by secretpumpkinking May 2, 2014

The Two-Piece

A good suck and handy performed in tandem

Sherrod gave me the two-piece last night

by CodyIsAPussyAssBitch March 12, 2023

Two Finger On Hand

Putting your two (or more fingers) above your forearm is the representation of shooting up heroin.

Did you see that guy do the new tiktok trend sheeeshhh?
Yeah, I hope he knows what it truly means.
Two Finger On Hand

by Willywilly1988 August 17, 2021

Two Stage Flute

When you fart during anal sex and it comes out the pitchers ass. When you both fart at the same time during anal sex

The anal sex was so extra we played the two stage flute.
I will wife a girl that plays the two stage flute with me!

by Nicknatgiveadogabone December 25, 2018

The two reasons to cook

The two reasons to cook are 1) so you can eat meals besides berries, veggies, and beans. 2) And to lick the bowl

There’s the two reasons to cook but I only cook for 1 reason, to lick the bowl.

by Maxiiboi November 23, 2019

Donkey between two haystacks

A difficult situation in which a palestinian chick is about to get seduced by two french speakers.

"Reem is like a donkey between two haystacks"

by Pembertonthedon November 5, 2013

1989-1992 (one thousand and eight nine to one thousand nine hundred and ninety two)

What I call homo-sapiens who are addicted to abscesses.

Person 1: Are you addicted to abscesses?
Person 2: Yes.
Person 1: 1989-1992 (one thousand and eight nine to one thousand nine hundred and ninety two)

by LeSouffleDeVersailles January 20, 2025