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moses

a ginger motherfucker who doesn't know what consent is or what empathy is or how to be a descent human being but claims he's a good christan. he also doesn't know how to make out and/or give hickeys. watch out for moses and/all gingers they all suck and are a leprechaun and like lucky charms.
oh look there's moses coming for your pot of gold while you are asleep, but make sure he doesn't get bored
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What happened when Moses spoke to the burning bush?

Either he engaged in DIRECT DIALOGUE with the CREATOR OF THE UNIVERSE... OR... HE DID NOT DO THAT. Maybe he had and appiphony and he considered THAT God. Maybe the bush had psychedelic properties and he got high and THOUGHT he spoke to the creator of the universe.
Hym "So, What happened when Moses spoke to the burning bush? Probably nothing. Burning bushes don't speak. The revelation he came up woth was in no way profound... Because they had JUST LEFT A CIVILIZATION... Where the laws were likely identical to the 10 commandments. And a better question than that would be 'If I went back in time and stood next to Moses... WOULD I SEE AND HEAR GOD WITH HIM?' Do you think... That a guy... SPOKE TO FUCKING GOD, JORDAN? And that God... SPOKE BACK TO THAT GUY IN DIRECT DIALOGUE? Is that a thing that YOU FUCKING THINK ACTIVELY AND ACTUALLY, JORDAN? Jesus fucking christ, it's like trying to get a special needs kid to admit to swallowing a lego! Did you eat that? DID YOU EAT THE LEGO?"

Jordan Peterson "NUHNGNUHNGNUHNG! DERRRR!"

Hym "That isn't a response to the words I said Jordan! Did you eat the fucking- Spit it out! Spit out the Lego Jordan!"
by Hym Iam May 27, 2024
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Mosed

a sexy young man that can take anyones girl
Mosed is too sexy to define.
by Clarke200 November 25, 2021
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Moses of Goshen

An alternative to saying “Jesus Christ” when expressing pain, surprise, discontent, and/or exasperation, typically uttered by members of the Jewish faith.
“They are late again?!? Moses of Goshen!”
“Moses of Goshen that hurt! I just stubbed my toe!”
“Moses of Goshen! He left the dishes in the sink again?!?”
by rfc723 December 1, 2021
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Like the tablets of Moses

I meant to say that. Goddamn it.
Hym "Carve my decree into a little girl like the tablets of Moses. I forgot to add the tablet part. It was super important and I forgot it. More important then your kids lives actually."
by Hym Iam March 6, 2024
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The Moses

A camel toe when a woman is on her period, signifying a parting of the red seas.
Sandy is definitely on her period right now and she's rocking The Moses splendidly.
by HarryElefante March 13, 2024
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