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alternative expert

An expert in producing alternative news, also called "fake news"
-Do you know Mike? He is a columnist and an alternative expert! -No I dont, and what do you mean with alternative expert. - He writes columns filled with facts, that has no relevance or is altered, but when you read it, it sounds good .
by Shoreline1 April 3, 2017
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alternative fart

When you manage to successfully blame some other person for your flatulence.
I like going to crowded bars where it's easy to release alternative farts.
by Mike Honcho FS July 17, 2017
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alternative white man

Someone of darker complexion raised in an administrative military atmosphere.
"What is your nationality?" " I am an Alternative White Man."
by 5tranger09 August 24, 2017
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alternative fap

Alternative fap is Trump Porn Material since it is based on alternative facts. Very popular niche in the US since the election of the President.
www.alternativefap.com
-President Trump, what do you do with your small hands?
-I'm all about alternative fap , just visit www.alternativefapc.com , you will see I have the best taste in the world, believe me
by thisissethc September 30, 2017
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alternative

How emo people describe themselves without actually saying "emo"
Person: Wow the music you listen to is kind of emo lol

Emo Person: No it's not!! It's ALTERNATIVE!
by mettycandy December 11, 2017
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"alternatives"-ad fury

The near-maniacal rage you feel when an online vendor/advertiser off-handedly remarks that a desired product/content is no longer offered/available, and then adds insult to injury by cheerfully cajoling, "But no worries --- check out some of our other awesome products/services, like these!", causing you to just wanna smash yer fist right through the screen in resentful frustration, since whatever "substitute" profferings they are showing you have virtually no resemblance whatever to what you were looking for and would certainly not be anywhere near as satisfying; it's almost like they're presuming to imply that THEY know more about what YOU want than YOU do YOURSELF!
Counsellor, sympathetically consoling a late-teens client who is practically climbing the walls in tearful frustration from having been cheekily offered "Super Mario" by an online-gaming website when he'd wanted to play a round of "Spy Hunter Classic" after a long day at high school, just as he'd been doing every evening for the past two years: Ah-haa --- sounds to me like a classic case of "alternatives"-ad fury --- I so totally "get ya", Young Man, and I don't blame ya one bit for feeling this way... a lot of companies sure don't consider what their customers truly want whenever they"update" their offerings, do they? Reminds me of a couple of local radio stations back when I was around your age --- all of a sudden they stopped playing their traditional soothing '60's 'n' '70's easy-listening music in favor of pop-bop and country-crap --- a LOT of adult-listeners were REALLY bummed out about that! Why, I myself STILL sorely miss that wonderful music almost thirty years later!
by QuacksO July 13, 2018
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alternative lumberjack

A recovering alternative kid that is angsty usually a part of the lgbt community that now found country music during their search to find god but has discover that they are not one or the other they or both therefore they are an alternative lumberjack
Guy 1: Yo that chick is something , I want to know more about her

Guy 2: goooo for it she’s one of those alternative lumberjacks 😉
by Angsty teen yeee hawww July 10, 2019
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