How about stop trying to use authority you don't have to compel people (from the shadows) to do things they don't want to do?
Hym "How bout dat for a better alternative, Dr. RAPE FARM?"
Dr. Rape Farm "Well, I need to control what my children are going to think and do in the future and for me to do that I need to have control of everyone around me and LYING BLATANTLY allows me to do that with greater ease. So I need you to shut the hell up so I can distill these retards into an abstract phantom and trick them into locking themselves into a state of perpetual solipsism so they don't interfere with MY LIFE and what I want to do."
Dr. Rape Farm "Well, I need to control what my children are going to think and do in the future and for me to do that I need to have control of everyone around me and LYING BLATANTLY allows me to do that with greater ease. So I need you to shut the hell up so I can distill these retards into an abstract phantom and trick them into locking themselves into a state of perpetual solipsism so they don't interfere with MY LIFE and what I want to do."
by Hym Iam March 13, 2024
Stuff that is not medicine, and has no medicinal properties, but conspiracy theorists and other dumbasses insist is the REAL medicine, because the entire healthcare field is a sham, or something, and the knowledge of people from 500-1000 years ago when they didn't even have toilets is superior to modern science.
Don't listen to those Big Pharma quacks telling you to get radiation treatment for your cancer, here, drink this soup of tree bark and lemongrass, it's alternative medicine.
by q359 July 25, 2023
Alternative Facts Syndrome is a person suffering from a disconnect from reality. This person does not accept facts and truths and will claim blatant lies as "facts" in their alternative facts reality.
This person is suffering from Alternative Facts Syndrome. That person believes Tariffs will be paid by the exporting country and will not affect them as the consumer. "They did their research."
by DMU77 February 02, 2025
The use of components other than alcohol to create a blend and fusion of work that can be seen as artistic. Alternative Media Mixology is specifically that Art of high-end card making using a range of colours, textures and smells which appeal to the senses in new and unique ways.
by Notelli November 01, 2011
To use a different (alternate) approach to solving a problem when the standard approach doesn't work, an approach that is less complicated than improvising.
There was no bell at the hotel front desk, so we alternized by saying "ding, ding" until the clerk came out of the back room.
by JBoftheWikipedia July 24, 2009
by Mike Honcho FS July 17, 2017
A person or persons whom are unable to operate a hammer or tools in general but are extremely capable with knowledge.
Suzan is functionally alternative, she might hurt herself with a soup spoon but she'll hurt you with her knowledge of appropriate Shakespeare insults.
by GridSquid September 02, 2022