Windows Apache

An inforcer of Windows Authority Program, commonly called upon by operating system if in danger.
The apache is flown by Microsoft Flight Sim AI

I screwed with Windows system files, then a Windows Apache came to my house and punished me.

by Rytherix July 31, 2006

Windows Pattern

The pattern Microsoft follows for making their oses.

IE: Suck, Good, Suck, Good

Windows 3.11 or 3.1 = Good, Windows 95 = Horrible, Windows 98 = Good, Windows 98 se = Fail Sauce, Windows 2000 = Good, Windows ME = Epic Fail, Windows XP = Amazing, Windows Vista = Windows ME on drugs, Windows 7 =Best Yet.

Pretty much everyone who has been buying every other os since windows 95 has been screwed in the ass. And people like me who have been buying every one since 3.1 have not been screwed at all.

John: I have owned 95, 98 se, Me, and Vista.

Me: So you have owned all the failures of oses?

John:????

Me: Have all those sucked?

John: Yes! OMG YES!!

Me: I have owned 3.11, 98, 2000, Xp, and 7.

John: Do they actually work with ALL your programs and hardware?

Me: Yes. Because Microsoft Taints every other os they make.

John: Why?

Me: Because they value their original customers like me, who have been buying their stuff since their first successfull os: 3.1

John: oh

Me: Yep.

windows xp windows vista windows 7 windows pattern

by wabbabu9776 June 7, 2009

Windows 8

Windows 8 is the next generation of Microsoft's Operating System family and its basically a virus that turns any capable, powerful desktop computer into a worthless pile of crap. Its a phone interface on top of a duller Windows Desktop but with some features also removed! :D The start menu disappeared by magic so its really good at making it harder than ever to find your files! :)

I have always wanted to spend ages getting to the work I need on my PC and thankfully Microsoft listened to my cry!

I also just love how it makes me feel like a kid again while I'm trying to get professional work done and the sad face on the blue screen of death is much more useful than actual technical information on the error!

Thanks a bunch Microsoft! There is no way in hell that I've deleted Windows and moved to Linux now :)

Idiot: Yo dawg herd bout dat cool new os Windows 8 its totally awesome!
Someone: Yes I had the developer preview a year ago... sucked then and sucks now... hate to be you man...

by brianmillar9 November 3, 2012

Windows 98

Ok! all you people saying it sucks and shit! it sucks now because its like over 10 years old and its no even supported! Back than it was like state-of-the-art!

Kid: Windows 98 sucks! It wont even run a programed designed specifically for windows vista!

Me: NO SHIT! ITS ONLY FOR WINDOWS VISTA YOU PIECE OF SKIN!

kid kills himself.

by wesikens March 3, 2008

Windows ME

Crap os that i have unfortunately got install on my pc. The ME part is an abbreviation of many errors

RRRRGH Windows ME crashed again i wish i had XP any donations send to.......(deleted)

by ben December 14, 2003

Steamy Windows

When a girl is wearing glasses and you cum in her eye and watch her glasses steam up that is now what you call steamy windows

Oh lads I shot my load last night and the bitch couldn't see because she had steamy windows

by Mr Fox 91 March 9, 2020

Windows Hour

When one is transferring files in Microsoft Windows, Windows will attempt to tell you how long it's going to take. A Windows hour can be 20 minutes, or it can be 5 hours. No one really knows!

I'm transferring 150 Gb of files to an external drive. It's currently sitting at 101 with an "hour" left. That's a Windows Hour, mind you.

by Kay Web September 10, 2010