monkey guarding

1. To stand in the way and wave arms frantically, like blocking a shot in basketball or soccer, usually without moving from the target area.

2. To keep others from getting a chance at something.

3. To try to hide something by putting your hands in front of it to keep it from being taken or viewed.

1. Buckwheat was penalized for once again monkey guarding the net.

2. Fat Frieda didn't let any of the other postal workers talk to her boss for fear they'd get her fired or promoted past her. Her co-workers knew she was monkey guarding the boss and got around her, getting her fired anyway.

3. Janette monkey guarded her coffee cup because she knew if Jack could get to it she wouldn't taste coffee the next time she drank it.

by HurtMyDog IKillYourCat November 6, 2010

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Raping the Guardrail

When someone takes a turn so wide and fast in their vehicle, that when they get to the end of the turn, they start driving up against the guardrail, tearing up their vehicle, and giving unwanted attention to the rail, thus raping it.

Driving Teacher: Well, Suzie, you pretty much raped the guardrail on that wide turn you made on the intersect. I'm going to have to fail your driving test.

by Mister E. March 27, 2005

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