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Bacon Proximity Index (BPI)

How far a given human being is from fresh hot bacon. This index value is an indicator of quality of life in both first and third world countries.

the BPI is the product of a number of variables
1. distance travel needed
2. modes of travel needed
3. local, relative cost of bacon
4. time required for bacon preparation
5. quality of bacon available
6. risks to be undertaken to achieve the bacon
I'm in Denny's right now bro, my Bacon Proximity Index (BPI) is at the absolute maximum value known in the universe.

triple the bacon on my bacon sundae.
by aaron_ros April 25, 2013
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The Law of Inverse Proximity

Someone living close to school/uni/work will always be later than someone living far away. The closer they live, the later they will arrive.
Lecturer: "John, how can you be late everyday? You live on campus!"
John: "It's the Law of Inverse Proximity, sir - I live so close it's physically impossible for me to get here on time!"
by tcadu vlacku June 3, 2011
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proximity

The immediate area surrounding an object.
The notepad has even proximity between each horizontal line.
by scruph May 12, 2008
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Proximitist

One who will ditch one crush/significant other for another, just because they are geographically closer. A proximity opportunist.
I wanted to have drinks with Quinn last night, but he's such a proximitist that he ditched me for Claire because she was already downtown.
by Maker upper of words July 20, 2008
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Proximity shower

A method of washing for when you have no hot water. You strip off and stand near the running water, using it to create a lather with soap, and rub that on yourself whilst you wait for the shower to reach the desired temperature. Useful in a hurry.
The boiler was out this morning so I took a proximity shower. It was awkward, but at least I'm clean.
by notmereally December 4, 2009
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Proximity Hotness

Definition: A person who is regarded as 'hot' only because they are close by or seen everyday.
Examples:

ex 1- " Joan is hot eh?"

" No she isn't. It's just because she working in our office, your suffering from proximity hotness..."

ex 2 - That dude is hot eh?"

" No he isn't. It's just because your in jail, your suffering from proximity hotness...

Other examples: office hot, school hot, some milfs, in rare occasions 'girl next door' is just proximity hotness or the dreaded jail hot.

Proximity hotness is also effected by the talent of hotness you see day to day. Less talent= more susceptible to proximity hotness.
by oakvilleBIGL October 30, 2011
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Proximity Piss

Someone who mistakenly gets blamed for pissing in a pint of beer and giving it to someone, due to being in the proximity of the real culprit(s).
Yeah dude, I was proximity pissed!

Just because I knew it had piss in it, doesn't mean I am responsible. (or does it?)
by AmberAle January 26, 2013
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