the feeling of panic, utter helplessness, and ineptitude, when someone is looking over your shoulder and you are trying to show them something on your computer
Mary had complete performance anxiety trying to navigate to the correct folder to show Jim the correct spreadsheet.
by Happy Girly of course! February 23, 2010
Get the Performance Anxiety mug.A avid cyclist who rodes a carbon bike, shaves is leg, wears a nice bike team kit, takes electrolytes, and hates everything else related to bike that does not match his profile. Expression popularized by cyclist/youtuber Robin Moore with his song "Performance".
Julia: I thought about you today, I saw a performance guy on Route 1.
Al: Cool! What kit was he wearing?
Julia: Not sure but he was freaking fast on a sparkling 2010 Trek Madone.
Al: Cool! What kit was he wearing?
Julia: Not sure but he was freaking fast on a sparkling 2010 Trek Madone.
by RealFast March 14, 2010
Get the performance guy mug.OMFG My Son Just Saw the Miley Cyrus TEen Choice Awards Performance of Party in the USA. Then the next day I caught him wearing a bra over a vest and in my thong.
by Miley Cyrus REal Miley March 16, 2010
Get the Miley Cyrus TEen Choice Awards Performance of Party in the USA mug.A form of pay used by some greedy employers to fuck it's hard working employees out of their pay while still showing record growth for the share holders and allowing the co to recive massive pay raises
Indra .I'm gonna fuck these employees or you could just give them performance pay boss lady. It's much better
by cheesy one September 19, 2016
Get the performance pay mug.{n.} The degree to which a male possesses the capacity for raising a flaccid, favorite organ to an upright or distended positon (e.g., a man's "sleeping" penis or -- as is the case with a male sage grouse or frigatebird -- an uninflated gular sac).
EXAMPLE:
' A unique physical feature of male great frigate birds was also bound to attract the attention of immature human males concerned with erectile performances of their own sex organs. Each male great frigate bird at mating time tried to attract the attention of females by inflating a bright red balloon at the base of his throat. At mating time, a typical rookery when viewed from the air resembled an enormous party for human children, at which every child had received a red balloon. The {Galápagos} island would in fact be paved with male great frigate birds with their heads tilted back, their qualifications as husbands inflated by their lungs to the bursting point—while, overhead, the females wheeled.
' One by one the females would drop from the sky, having chosen this or that red balloon.
" After Mary Hepburn showed her film about the great frigate birds, some student, . . . almost invariably a male, was sure to ask, sometimes clinically, sometimes as a comedian, sometimes bitterly, hating and fearing women: "Do the females always try to pick the biggest ones?"
' So Mary was ready with a reply: "To answer that, we would have to interview female great frigate birds, and no one has done that yet, so far as I know. Some people have devoted their lives to studying them, though, and it is their opinion that the females are in fact choosing the red balloons which mark the best nesting sites. " '
-- From Kurt Vonnegut's 1985 novel "Galápagos" -- Ch. 20 (p. 114).
' A unique physical feature of male great frigate birds was also bound to attract the attention of immature human males concerned with erectile performances of their own sex organs. Each male great frigate bird at mating time tried to attract the attention of females by inflating a bright red balloon at the base of his throat. At mating time, a typical rookery when viewed from the air resembled an enormous party for human children, at which every child had received a red balloon. The {Galápagos} island would in fact be paved with male great frigate birds with their heads tilted back, their qualifications as husbands inflated by their lungs to the bursting point—while, overhead, the females wheeled.
' One by one the females would drop from the sky, having chosen this or that red balloon.
" After Mary Hepburn showed her film about the great frigate birds, some student, . . . almost invariably a male, was sure to ask, sometimes clinically, sometimes as a comedian, sometimes bitterly, hating and fearing women: "Do the females always try to pick the biggest ones?"
' So Mary was ready with a reply: "To answer that, we would have to interview female great frigate birds, and no one has done that yet, so far as I know. Some people have devoted their lives to studying them, though, and it is their opinion that the females are in fact choosing the red balloons which mark the best nesting sites. " '
-- From Kurt Vonnegut's 1985 novel "Galápagos" -- Ch. 20 (p. 114).
by Dinkum August 25, 2013
Get the erectile performance mug.1. (n) description of a drunken person's actions from the night before. To qualify, the actions must be embarrasing and unremembered by the drunk.
1. Wow, Jeremy, that was a stellar performance last night.
2. -Guys what did I do last night?! -Dude, you had a stellar performance.
2. -Guys what did I do last night?! -Dude, you had a stellar performance.
by Jeremy Jenkins October 15, 2004
Get the stellar performance mug.A process where some cunt you're forced to spend far too much time with sits you down and wastes an hour of your life every year telling you how wonderful they are and how rubbish you are in order to justify their own meaningless existence and make them feel powerful.
The degree of shit you'll receive generally depends on how well you've covered up the cunt's mistakes over the year and also depends on how brown your tongue is from ass licking over the year.
To be treated with utter contempt unless you are a brown tongued ass licker in which case you can fuck off. PS your colleagues hate you.
The degree of shit you'll receive generally depends on how well you've covered up the cunt's mistakes over the year and also depends on how brown your tongue is from ass licking over the year.
To be treated with utter contempt unless you are a brown tongued ass licker in which case you can fuck off. PS your colleagues hate you.
Manager: It's time for your Performance Review
Employee: Woo! I can't wait for this valuable loopback session!
Fast forward for an hour:
Manager: So in summary, you've met all of your objectives all year and been a key member of the team. We're not giving you a pay award however as you've had a haircut that was outside of our dress code and appearance policy and took a day off when your father died and expected to be paid for it.
Employee: Woo! I can't wait for this valuable loopback session!
Fast forward for an hour:
Manager: So in summary, you've met all of your objectives all year and been a key member of the team. We're not giving you a pay award however as you've had a haircut that was outside of our dress code and appearance policy and took a day off when your father died and expected to be paid for it.
by HR_Advisory January 4, 2012
Get the Performance Review mug.