DOOM! Magazine 

Magazine known for asking everyone they interview how they'll survive the Zombie Apocalypse.

DOOM! Magazine: "How would you survive the Zombie Apocalypse?"

Elvira, Mistress of the Dark (Cassandra Peterson): "Well, like I always say, if you can’t beat them, join them. First I would beat them, I’d beat the crap out of them, then if that didn’t work, I’d join them. And then I’d go to Disneyland!"

DOOM! Magazine by Steampunk Octopod January 5, 2012

magazine clip 

The most advanced and powerful way yet to store ammunition in a firearm. The only system currently using it is the state of the art Ghost Gun(c) (exclusively found in California) wich is invisible to metal detectors and has ability to disperse with the 30 cal magazine clip in half a second. This gives it an effective fire-rate of 3600 rounds per minute, only surpassed by the Gatling-family of machine-guns.

"This is a Ghost Gun(c). It has ability with a 30-caliber magazine clip to disperse with 30 bullets within half a second. Thirty magazine clip in half a second.” - California State Senator Kevin de Leon.

magazine clip by Dakka-Mek February 20, 2014

Blender Magazine 

Blender Magazine

(1) a magazine in a blender

(2) The Leaders of Decling and Idiocy Literature.

(3) The worst magazine you can read. If you follow, believe, agree, and read Blender, do not hope that you will become successful.

(4) Stupid literature

Blender Magazine is one of the worst magazines. They show their stupidty by placing top 100 best and worst. Sometimes from the best and worst bands to who pees the best/worst.

Blender has attacked some greats, good, and ok bands as being worst the bands or worst lyricist. They named the legendary group The Doors as one of the worst bands and Jim Morrison as one of the worst writers. They used an example of "Ramble On" by the Led Zeppelin as horrible writing. However, Blender Magazine has named the horrible "Black Parade" album as the best and puts stupid people like Avril Lavigne on the magazine covers. How can you say those bands are the worst if they are clearly idiots and avoided saying bands Fall Out Boy, Good Charlotte, All American Rejects, 30 Seconds to Mars were one of the worst. That is an example of how bad and avoidable this magazine should.

The people at Blender Magazine deserve a 1000 deaths and tortures. These deaths

ICP: They call us the worst so that's why most of the guys at Blender have a hachet through their head.

Guy: Blender Magazine sucks!
Jim: what are you doing?
Bob: Blender Magazine (1)

Rocker with a great rock band: They may name me the worst artist, but I pee on their magazine.

Blender Magazine(2): That's it my children keep reading it! ha ha ha ha

Hobo With a Shotgun: you better have sucked your last cock!

Blender Magazine(2): ohh, I hate you

Hobo with A Shotgun: *shoots they guy from Blender in the face and groin*

Guy: what are you reading?

Kid: Blender Magazine (3)

Guy: If I were you, I throw it in the trash or blended.

Kid: *Kid looks at the cover* ya, you're right, this magazine is horrible.

Smart Girl: What the hell am I reading?

Friend: oh a Blender Magazine (4)

Smart Girl: oh yeah! thanks!

Blender Magazine by Sleez Boy March 14, 2008

forbes magazine 

Porn for rich people. An industry magazine where the bourgeoisie elite compare gross figures and share ideas on how to further oppress the proletariat. Often used as a cutting board for cocaine, or rolled up and used to beat the Hispanic maid when she breaks something expensive.

Herbert: "Consuela, did you break my $18,000 crystal statue for Most Racist Employer of 2009?"
Consuela: "Si, senor, lo siento, I --"
*WHACK* *WHACK* *WHACK*
Consuela: "Ay, no!"

Nathan: (reading Forbes Magazine) "I can't wait to use these new marketing techniques to persuade the working class to give me all their money!"
*lays magazine out on table and proceeds to make lines of cocaine with a black American Express card*

forbes magazine by Merriam Chubster December 5, 2013

Take A Break Magazine 

A UK Magazine aimed mostly at Chav Women. Used to somehow justify claiming benefits of all kinds whilst breeding like rats.

My Mum shagged my boyfriend whilst I was giving birth to My Brother`s Girlfriend`s surrogate Child. Give Me £300 and I`ll tell the whole world about it in "Take A Break Magazine".

Take A Break Magazine by Proper Londoner October 24, 2008

Magazine Rack 

A male who holds onto issues and is not equipped to handle conflict. This type of person tends to jump to conclusions and will not give you the benefit of doubt. His need for acceptance is so high that he will overstep boundaries but will not own up to his wrong doing. The only way you can have a cordial dialogue with this type of person is to feed his ego.

Girl 1: Augh...I have a meeting with magazine rack.

Girl 2: Good luck, remember to call him by his name, and try to be nice to him or you will hurt his feelings, again.

Magazine Rack by Grasshopper77 July 16, 2018

People Magazine

A magazine that follows around celebrities and reports their breakups, makeups, fights "facebook and or twitter wars" and everything else.
Usually everything is fake.
Also, People would rather talk about Brad Pitt than a girl found. after 28 years.

Becky: I hate People Magazine, those liars.

People Magazine by insertstupidwittyfunnynamehere February 27, 2011