Stumpy lumber jack 

To wake up with morning wood late for work show up and your dick gets caught in a wood chipper.

Mike woke up with morning wood tripped and fell in a wood chipper,oh I guess you can say he called now a stumpy lumber jack. Careful working around the equipment boys don't want to stumpy lumber jack yourself.

Stumpy lumber jack by Pours when it rains December 12, 2023

Lumber Jacks 

A group of girls that are constantly negative and always cutting everyone else down.

Well we all wanted to stay out drinking but the Lumber Jacks are making us go home.

They are always cutting us down.

Lumber Jacks by Modeen August 27, 2014

lumber-jacking off 

When one masturbates upon waking up in an effort to relieve themselves of morning wood

Yeah I caught Johnny lumber-jacking off on PornHub in his bed yesterday after his 6:30am alarm.

lumber-jacking off by Medici32 May 29, 2016

Lumber Jackie 

A straight female who dresses like a dyke.

"Marsha gets all the girls because she is so Lumber Jackie. She should consider dialing down the flannel if she wants them to know she is straight."

Lumber Jackie by Cjohnson02000 July 24, 2018

lumber-jacking 

The highly disciplined art of simultaneously defecating and masturbating.

One thing Cliff really enjoys is a good lumber-jacking.

lumber-jacking by Douglas Thorneloe January 10, 2009

Lumbar Jack 

A pun based on the word, Lumberjack, this phrase describes the act of masturbating and ejaculating onto the lower back (or lumbar region) of a woman.

Commonly performed by chiropractors while performing spinal adjustments.

This hot patient of mine wanted her spine adjusted so I took the opportunity for a quick lumbar jack. Ya, she sued, but I kept my license to practice.

Lumbar Jack by Reddition June 9, 2011

Lumber-Jacking 

The act of masterbaiting to a tree .

Guy 1 : Bro did you see him Lumber-Jacking the other day.
Guy 2 : Yeah, it was intense.

Lumber-Jacking by JeromeTheMole December 1, 2021