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Custody

Custody of the police or a puzzle factory.
While the police are busy taking the guy with the Madonna tattoo on his chest into custody, nobody is paying attention to the girl with the Elvis riding a dragon tattoo on her chest, saying that if she flexes her muscles that somebody needs to bring her some toilet paper so she can wipe the dragon's ass. She should also be taken into custody, are people going to let her get away with that?
by The Original Agahnim September 24, 2021
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Joint Custody

When you know you can't finish a joint on your own, so you share it with a homie.
Kaitlin: "Hey, I want to buy a joint but I get way too blitzed when I smoke by myself "

Tim: "no problem, wanna have joint custody? I'll split it with you!"
by Amy911 October 20, 2017
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custody hangover

When a complicated holiday visitation schedule was agreed upon when you were a child and your parents divorced, and violating it now (years after it has legally expired) would start world war 3 in your family.
"Why don't you and Darren spend Christmas together? You've been dating for 5 years!"
"Oh, I still have a custody hangover."
by firefoxx66 December 15, 2016
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Joint custody

When you have legal rights to demand a toke of your buddy's spliff
"Hey, I have joint custody over your Mary Jane!"

"Fuck off bro, god damn!"
by SummonerofFaiths July 5, 2020
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Custodial entertainer

The person who spends more time with a child than the actual parents.
"That's my Grandma Linda, she's my custodial entertainer" Lilly said.
by billyboombox June 2, 2016
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Full Custody

Full custody is the act of shooting your load onto someone and then grabbing it; maintaining control, so you can rid of the evidence in a one fell swoop before they can do anything to make you pay child support.
"Oh shucks, I just finished on this girl, I better take Full Custody of my load before this crazy woman does something drastic with my unegged children."
by Grossman27 November 8, 2025
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joint custody

when 2 ppl pay for a joke
yeah we went to the disco together we got joint custody
by rattimeaf July 20, 2021
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