beached whale

When you take a dump while sitting on the toilet backwards so that your fecal matter ends up on the dry part of the toilet and not in the water.

Last time I used Gabe's bathroom I left a gnarly beached whale.

by wigwam69 September 9, 2006

beached whale syndrome

When someone particularly lazy and/or fat is assigned a task in which they have decided is too hard. They solve the problem by lying on the ground and whining/moaning resembling a beached whale. OR when one or more lazy fat people watch a more fit, less lazy person do work.

Example 1: The Freshman P.E. class got the beached whale Syndrome when they were told to run the mile.

Example 2: I couldn't answer my phone because my boss got beached whale syndrome

by Little Boots May 26, 2009

Beached White Male

Due to the prolonged economic down-turn not even the traditionally "safe" demographic of white, middle aged, educated males has not remained safe from unemployment due to a dwindling middle-class. Once executive or professional, their employability now is as hopeless as a "beached whale's" survivability.

BMW, for short, it's an ironic turn of phrase. Also known as "Dead Suit Walking".

Look at that Beached White Male over there. He went from driving a BMW to being one!

by Tenacious Faulker May 18, 2011

Beached As

when you are stuck on a beach in New Zealand, and you are a whale talking to a Seagull. Also refers to a bucket of water and a hose to get wet asap, and planktooon. Mostly this ends up in fish and chups.
On a side note, Whales cant chew.

I'm beached as bro!

by Dson001 January 8, 2009

Beached

This happens when one is takeing a shit on the crapper and the turd ends up laying on the porcelin out of the water.

Man-Hey I was cleaning up after the party we had last night and someone beached in the down stairs toilet!

Friend-You dont mean?

Man-Yep the motherfucker was out of the water laying on the porcelin.

by troubledemon April 2, 2009

beached shark

Rancid pussy that smells like a wet cardboard box filled with expired bananas and sardines that has been sitting in the back of a Dominican grocery store since its last random inspection two years before.

Have you ever gone down on beached shark? No, you haven't. How can I tell? Your lower face is intact.

by Ramalishtic April 29, 2014

Beached it up

When you take your normal day in day out routine and change a significant element of it make it all fresh and new again. Beaching it up - could be you taking your department to the beach one day to run your office and explore how the new environment changes your energy, your attitude, your perspective, your collaborations. Beaching it up could be just as simple as running a meeting where you all sit on bean bag chairs in a circle ... or hitting a deck with a glass of wine for that next production meeting.

Ryan sure Beached it Up when he took us to Crystal Cove to run our brainstorming session. I could feel the energy and passion flow by everyone around us!

by MMartster May 20, 2017