Sperms

The stuff I find in my jammies in the morning that tastes like mushrooms. Note: Traditionally the noun "sperm" is one of many English nouns that does not take the pluralizing 's', serving as both the singular and plural form (not unlike "goose," "moose," and "penis"). Recently however, several prominent sperm doctors, policy analysts, and kindergartners have begun experimenting with the more commonsensical--though admittedly jarring--"sperms" (See William Safire's "Whoppers Junior and Sperms Whale" for a more thorough discussion). One lexicographer has noted, as a recent variant of the ubiquitous "Kilroy was here" graffito, the emergence of "Kilroy's sperms was here." Debate has sprung up in certain circles whether the singular verb here is a deliberate, if cheeky, attempt by urban wordsmiths to keep the state of the language in play as an ironic gesture of postmodern insouciance regarding the moribund strictures of prescriptive grammar, and as a Nietzschean celebration of linguistic, and therefore metaphysical, uncertainty, or whether it's simply a mistake.

"Mommy, I found more sperms in my jammies this morning. They taste like mushrooms." "Capt. Thomas, hoping to avoid impregnating his wife, sexited his member from her love-tunnel and loosed his sperms on his nearby pirate hat."

by Dr. M.P. Brody, PhD January 21, 2009

sperm

tiny white ninjas that can make ur life living hell when it reaches its destination.

Dog sperm tastes like ketchup.

by little white ninja May 20, 2010

sperm

sperm. the stuff that comes out of ur dick when u masterbate.

shit! i got sperm all over my bed!

by anderson September 1, 2004

sperm

an elite force from the male genetalia destined to find thier one true love the egg. or in other terms the sprinkles in your frosting from below.

my sperm are sperminatious.
im a sperm i helped create you, yes you faggot.

by call me clinton..bill clinton November 6, 2003

sperm

1.-noun- plural- A male's multiple friends living inside their penis.

I like to spend time and enjoy life with my sperm.

Me and my sperm have fun together at parties.

by fab5ive August 11, 2003

sperm

A nasty, white, creamy, glow in the dark, radioactive substance that is launched out of the males penis upon orgasm.

Sperm is vile and disgusting.

by Nick H. June 30, 2005

Sperming

Moving through a crowd to get to the front, commonly done at concerts. Not to be confused with Salmoning, which is walking against a group of moving people.

Lindsay: How did you make it to the front of the crowd?

Paris: I am a master at sperming.

by Deepthoughts December 30, 2011