The Platinum Solution

Spending over $100,000 in taxpayer funds to implement a shit collection of shit band-aid solutions on some existing piece of fucking shit.

Gov guy 1: "Man, I can't believe you spent a hundred bucks on that piece of shit car."
Gov guy 2: "Yeah, it's not gonna work. We better invest a few hundred K in improving it."
Gov guy 1: "You know you can get a solid, working car for $10,000, right?"
Gov guy 2: "Yeah, but then I'd have to admit that I threw away that initial hundred bucks, and I'm much too proud. So, you know, I'ma implement The Platinum Solution"

by PositiveZero April 14, 2008

final solution

Phrase referring to the ungodly evil plan to exterminate all Jews by Adolf Hitler and the Nazi pollitical party during WWII. Evolved between 1933 and 1941 as Hitler's political and military fortunes shifted, although Hitler himself made it clear in as early as 1924 that "it is necessary to rid Germany of all Jews."

Some accounts have Hitler and the Nazi party only wanting Jewish culture and it's beliefs removed from Germany, however it is commonly believed that he wanted them physically exterminated (dead).

Hitler wanted to administer the final solution to the Jewish population of Germany.

by ACG2x January 7, 2004

Red solution

When a redneck from the south with a small penis rubs mt.dew, redbull, and gas on his penis, then take 5 pills of Viagra and gets drunk and screws a cat in the back of his cummins truck.

Wow he really should do a red solution because of his small penis and he's from the south.

by Drew Shipley 69 February 2, 2014

Henny Youngman solution

Telling someone that the solution to a problem is to simply not do anything that exposes the flaw that causes the problem. From the old Henny Youngman joke: "Doctor, it hurts when I do this!" "Don't do that." Usually, but not always, associated with computers.

"The program crashes when I try to print!"
"Don't try to print."
"Do you have a real solution or just a Henny Youngman solution?"

by Al Benedict January 4, 2008

Solutionology

Solutionology is the artful science of advanced problem solving. The byproduct of resourceful ingenuity, located at the intersection of critical thinking and creative reasoning, it is what occurs when one believes so strongly that the answer to a problem is out there, that s/he will not rest until a solution is found – producing a remedy that previously did not exist within his or her realm of awareness.

Me: "I had no idea what I was going to do when my house was scheduled for foreclosure, but I found a company that helped me come up with the solutionology for my situation. They helped me avoid the foreclosure AND put money in my pocket."

Response: "No way!"

Me: "Way! These guys are the real effin' deal."

by solutionologists May 26, 2014

turnkey solution

All set up ready to go... originally used regarding computer software - locked and loaded, just needs the turnkey to operate....

In other words - another friggin' meaningless buzz word seconded to every two bit copywriter in need of a sales point when they don't know what their software, company or boss actually does

We offer turnkey solutions to all your business needs

by The Fast Rita October 25, 2007

Skymall solution

An absurdly single-purposed tool or solution which solves a problem you don't actually have. Like many products in the popular in-flight catalog, Skymall.

I thanked my cousin for the gift of a Hot Dog Toaster, but thought I'd never need to cook enough hot dogs to justify owning such a Skymall solution.

by epynephrin September 14, 2012