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Monocelebpic

Monocelebpic

An insulting term for a thick person obsesses by photographs, film and video of one celebrity, who they try a look and act like.
Example: "That Chanelle from Big Brother is a monocelebpic copy of that Poshspice bird"
by Peter Glum September 20, 2007
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beer monocle

like beer goggles, except the person with the monocle on is so drunk one eye is closed shut...therefore, turning the goggles into a monocle.
I would have never fucked that fat whore had i not been wearing the beer monocle.
by rob z February 15, 2005
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Monocle Swap

The phrase "Monocle Swap" refers to a sexual act being performed by two distinguished and exceedingly classy/cultured individuals, of any gender combination. (male/female, female/female, and male/male monocle swaps are all possible.)

The act can be described as follows: Mid-coitus (in any variation/position) the two involved parties simply exchange eyewear (in this case, a monocle or two) in a gesture of extreme intimacy and respect for each other. This can be considered as the sexual equivalent of a hat-tip on excellent sexual performance and prowess.

It has even been documented that the act of monocle-swapping itself has lead to intense orgasms and the formulation of "Great American Novels" and speeches of note.
"I say! Last night's monocle swap with George was the finest I do believe I've ever had! Simply smashing"

"Really, old bean? Well, then. I shall bequeath my monocle onto Cynthia's face tonight... along with a little something extra!"

*mutual laughter and pipe smoking ensues*
by Funcommunist December 13, 2012
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whiskey monocle

A device put in place shortly after achieving a buzz. Skews potential mate rating scale in favor of the person being viewed through the monocle.
Bar Guy 1: "Wow, I'd need serious beer goggles for her!"
Bar Guy 2: "Nah, If I put on my whiskey monocle and close one eye... she is totally doable."
by SteveTech October 15, 2008
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Bi-monocle

Wearing a monocle on each eye to make it look like one is wearing glasses.
"Anyone can wear glasses...but it takes skill to manage wearing Bi-monocles."
by randymachomansavage11 July 22, 2012
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hot monocle

Similar to a mayonaise monocle but actually in the eye, causing a burning sensation to the victim.
See seagulling.

Holy damn, thats no seagull - I've got a hot monocle!
by I'm not Tom! June 28, 2004
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The Monocle

When you remove a girl’s glass eye and thrust your penis in and out of her eye socket.
I monocled her last night

I want to stab my girlfriend’s eye out so I can do "The Monocle" on her.
by SayThwat February 5, 2009
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