liverpool 

A complete hellhole. A town full of sordid, tango-tanned scrubbers and thick, ignorant, aggressive scallies. If you've ever seen the Burt Reynolds film 'Deliverance you'll have some idea what these people are like. These slackjawed, shaven-headed morons (otherwise known as 'friendly, witty scousers') are amongst the most violent and bigoted people on the planet. If you have the misfortune to live here ( and I do), for god's sake don't show any individuality, and try not to be from an ethnic background because they'll very probably kill you. Laughably this dump was awarded 'European City of Culture' for 2008, notwithstanding the fact that its so-called 'culture' consists of the 'Beatles' who left here in 1963 and never came back, and some of the worst clubs on earth playing the cretinous 'scouse-house'. Here are some tips for fitting in if you have the bad luck to end up here. These tips should ensure survival:

1. wear a tracksuit (women may wear pyjamas)
2. shave your head (women should be bottle blond)
3. develop a guttural whine (both sexes)
4. gob on the floor frequently (experts recommend at least every 10 steps) (both sexes)
5. try not to finish a sentence without using the F word at least fourteen times (again, both sexes)
6. steal anything that isn't nailed down
7. talk in an extremely loud voice (as you're so 'witty' everyone will want to hear your opinions)
8. glare at everyone in a threatening manner, especially students, 'goths' and anyone perceived to be'gay'
9. Call anyone not wearing a tracksuit 'gay' then beat them up
10. tell everyone how 'scousers are the friendliest people in the world aren't they though?'

The earth has to have an arse and Liverpool is it.

liverpool by the masked nanker September 16, 2008

Liverpool 

To hit the frame of the goal in a game of football

Johnny has Liverpooled all his shots today, it just wont go in for him

Liverpool by Reightman September 15, 2012

Liverpool 

A city full of obnoxious self important morons.

In 2 hrs at Lime Street station I was asked for money three times, cigarettes 3 times, and if I wanted to buy drugs - once. On a night out in Liverpool my girlfriend and I left by taxi because of the atmosphere, it was the same as you get just before a war. We went to Manchester - great place, great people, fabulous time.

Walking through liverpool after the Football teams triumphant return was like walking through an end of the world scenario. Shop windows were smashed, litter was ankle deep,cars had been overturned. You couldn't pay me enough to go back. Fence it off and nuke it.

Liverpool by vintage62 June 11, 2006

LIVERPOOL 

A stinking shithole of a city populated by the lowest people on the planet. If you arrive at Lime Street Station take my advice and get on the first train out to anywhere else. This place makes downtown Baghdad look like Venice at the height of summer. As soon as you step out of Lime Street you are greeted by a decaying concrete monstrosity and the most chavs you will ever see in one place. True there are a couple of niceish buildings but would you travel to Kabul to see one pretty building?

Forget anything you have heard about scouse humour. If your idea of comedy is robbing grannies, begging in the street, sniffing glue, stabbing anyone for anything or shoplifting then you will have a ball. Otherwise stay away.

Another warning is avoid these scumbags when they travel abroad. I live in Amsterdam and due to those twats at easyjet these arseholes can now travel abroad quite cheaply. They are easy to spot as they come here with one pair os shell suit bottoms and one liverpool FC top. They generally hunt in packs ie they come in a bar bringing a liverpool flag, sing for an hour and fuck off. They are hated by all (especially the dutch)and should not be allowed passports. Build a wall round the place and do everybody a favour.

Try playing spot the scouser at Schiphol going back to Liverpool. My Dutch mates think it is hilarious that people should be allowed to dress like they do.

LIVERPOOL by heerhugowaard November 10, 2008

Liverpool 

Gloomy, grey, depressing: basically a complete and utter hell hole. I'm not even a narrow-minded tosser who has never visited, I've lived here a while and it's dreadful. St. Johns is scally central...you call that a bloody shopping mall? The locals screech and whine with their god-awful accents and I get a headache after listening to one of these creatures for more than 3 minutes. The place somehow won "Capital of Culture 2008" even though it's crap and the only culture I've seen is yob culture. The only vaguely nice area is the Cavern Quarter. I avoid going out at night because the sight of tangoed scally female clones with poker straight hair and skirts up to their waists and scally male clones with shaved heads and their neanderthal walk truly disturbs me.

I even saw an elderly man throw a crisp packet over his shoulder while sitting on a bench in Liverpool. He thinks it's crap too no doubt.

Liverpool by starstarstar October 21, 2006

Liverpool 

A city in North East England located 40 minutes from rivel city Manchester. A very dirty city with very rude people. A harbour front that smells of dead fish from the factories, and also a city were kids are not allowed in stores after 6PM.

Liverpool customer: "Do you sell toothpaste?"
clerk: "Well what do you think you fuc*ing bastard? bloody ell you stupid person"
Liverpool customer: "GO FUCK A MONKEY YOU FAT BITCH"

Liverpool by Jessiegigglepuffs April 16, 2006

Liverpool 

A poor, crime-ridden city in the North-West of England.
The locals are known as Scousers or Bin-Dippers and have an inferiority complex unmatched anywhere else in the world.

The city often plays itself as the victim. Getting upset at the mildest of criticism. It's reputation of being a crime-ridden cesspit is often disputed by locals, who point to crime figures below that of other major cities. What the locals fail to mention is that Crime is so widespread there, most of it doesn't get reported.

It is the home of two football teams. Liverpool FC are one of the most successful teams in Europe. Everton FC are not. Tranmere Rovers are also local but are based on the Wirral. They reject accusations of being scousers, even through they have a scouse accent and the place is a dump.

Despite all it's poverty and social issues, Liverpool undoubtedly has the sexiest women in the UK.

Man 1: I got mugged again.
Man 2: Ah, you're still living in Liverpool.

Man 1: Look at the norks on that woman!
Man 2: That's scouse women for you! There's something in the water up there. I bet she's filthy too.

Liverpool by Blooty Yeah Yeah November 30, 2009