No matter who you are and no matter where you are, there’s always a very small chance Jimmy Kimmel will appear and sexually assault you in moments notice.
It may have a 0.00001% chance of happening, but you cannot rule out the idea.
It may have a 0.00001% chance of happening, but you cannot rule out the idea.
Jay and Jeff subconsciously sat with their backs facing the wall of the bar. With the Jimmy Kimmel Conundrum top of mind, they both agreed to have their eyes peeled on the door.
by Eddie Lacy's Cousin May 31, 2024

A mysterious object, said to have been lost long ago. Nobody has ever seen it, not even Kimmel himself. Prevailing theories on the matter include his penis being absorbed back into his body to make his boobs bigger, getting lost under his stomach fat, and Kimmel eating it as a small child.
"What's that fleshy pink thing in the closet"
"I'm pretty sure that's Kimmel's penis"
"Should we give it to him?"
"Nah leave it there he doesn't use it"
"I'm pretty sure that's Kimmel's penis"
"Should we give it to him?"
"Nah leave it there he doesn't use it"
by Big Shlong Man April 7, 2022

by Tittylord69 February 26, 2019

When the voices of dissent were muted, the crowd flexed its Kimmel Muscle and turned silence into a louder chorus.
by kelamist September 23, 2025

James Christian Kimmel is a talk show host who is single handedly ruining entertainment on YouTube and TV with his brand of humor that appeals mostly to out-of-touch Gen Xers and Millenials. His remaining audience consists of NPCs who have no perception of humor.
by Ziggmanster June 1, 2025

by PapaSmurf53 March 22, 2025

by FunkyColdMelina September 25, 2025
