Johnathan

Johnathan is a real shady shadester. Trust him, pffft— NEVER. He’s the type of guy that will turn wine into water, and marijuana into oregano. He’s full of hijinks and tomfoolery, none of which you want to get involved in. Sure, he seems like a trustworthy fellow, his common name even alludes to that, but it’s the spelling that throws the massive curveball and makes all the difference. Watch your back, and your front, because that twinkle in his eye doesn’t mean he’s sweet on you, it means he’s about to hustle you and you’ve already fallen for it. How bittersweet.
You woke up and your identity was stolen, and dignity is missing?! He totally pulled a Johnathan on you.
by P3nny January 19, 2018
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Johnathan

A boy with lots of wonderful thoughts that will share anything with you. Will keep a secret safe regardless of how good it may be. Will always try to cheer you up even when he may be feeling down too.

Suffering in his life has caused a spot of permanant sadness in his eyes, but they shine bright when he smiles.

Medium in stature, large in heart. Most likely will have kinda of curly hair and with big hands😂🤲

a very skilled kisser, has had lots of experience but will settle down upon finding the right girl (taken tho, by the best gf ever) has a reputation for being a flirt or a (hoe) but that is just his personality. His really handsome, smart, amazing and very VERY attractive. usually long eyelashes, kissable lips and a smile that can light up a room. Will make your stomach filled with butterflies no matter how used you are to seeing him.
girl1: Wow thats a who's that guy over there?

girl2: That must be a johnathan beacause i wanna fuk him instantly!

girl1: MEEEEEE TOOOO!!!
by Johnathan B. April 29, 2018
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Johnathan

The guy who did a muscular stretch because he couldn't afford cotton balls that one time.
Example 1
Pharmacist: Dude that white guy just parked in my parking lot without paying

Person: Oh he's a total Johnathan

Example 2
Customer 1: You saw that man who couldn't afford cotton balls?

Customer 2: Oh yeah he's probably a Johnathan
by kuntigyal May 30, 2018
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Johnathan

A word to describe a total douche. This guy is usually the one your girlfriend will cheat on you with. If she's smarter than that, then he'll be the one to coax her into it. A Johnathan drinks heavily and smokes dope 24/7. His music choice is the shittiest of rap. He wears only wife-beaters and sags his camo shorts. You do not want to be around a Johnathan.
God, that guy is such a Johnathan.

Ah, my girlfriend cheated on me with Johnathan!
by thatguychris423 August 05, 2014
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Johnathan

Johnathan is such a weeb
by TaKshi69420 December 03, 2019
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Johnathan

He is fat, gets no girls, has very ugly skin, has chapped lips. Johnathan is a type of boy you’ll want out of your life, he acts white
You will never want a Johnathan in your life
by Very honest April 05, 2018
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Johnathan

A guy known from all girls to have a enormous dick and knows how to use it very well
Johnathan is someone who i wish i had as a "friend"
by FrosTsXNINEall February 16, 2020
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