human race

A group of highly evolved assholes who mysteriously appeared on the third planet from the sun in a tiny solar system who spend their meaningless, short lifespans trying to figure out themselves, the world around them, and their fellow assholes. As of late, a solid conclusion to the problem of their existence has yet to be found, and continued conflicts between different groups of assholes plague the minuscule planet on which they reside, as well as the human race itself.

"Hey, Joe. Did you hear the news last night?"

"Yeah. That's some twisted shit. Man, I hate the human race."

by Pessimistic-Panda September 14, 2014

Human Parking Cone

When two jacked midgets paint themselves orange and you have to parallel park between them.

You can find a human parking cone at New York's hottest club, Blitzen!

by RedAckbar December 14, 2010

Husk of a human

When you look in the mirror and no longer recognize yourself, you feel a black emptiness inside and have lost all interest in life. You feel a mind numbing pain that you've given up on treating and you make it through the day because its all you know how to do, antidepressants never worked, therapy was a joke and as you sit there in your run down apartment in the ghetto you think about all your failures that have steered you to this moment and you feel that black tar or depression suffocating you. You have stopped brushing your teeth and washing your hair, you eat just enough to survive, you're too afraid of death to kill yourself. You're empty. You know there is no one to blame but yourself, you know that if you really tried, maybe, just maybe you could fix things, just a bit, but you never will.

"He said he felt like a husk of a human"

by Giskard Reventlov April 15, 2018

human diary

The equivalent of a diary but representing a person. In other words your best friend. The person who knows everything about you and you trust them to keep your memories, thoughts, and feelings safe.

Many people refer to their lover as their human diary.

I love you! You are my human diary!

by In love with Angelica April 8, 2017

vege-human

the newest vegan product by Worthington most useful while proselytizing to various cannibalistic tribes in Africa and inner Australia.

Sauteed in olive oil and garlic, this vege-human is quite tasty. All the body of the real thing with none of the guilt.

by ken69 January 27, 2009

Human Glue

Male ejaculate

The vision of Tracey's swinging knockers was too much for Liam to bare. As he sat on the bus with his shopping bags hiding his bulge, he discharged violently and without contol, filling his trousers with a seemingly endless stream of cock sick.
He felt hollow, desperate to clean up his awful mess. But with 8 stops to go he could do nothing but let himself dry, the spunk fusing his leg hairs to his pants like Human Glue

by Herbert Schweffe August 19, 2018

human verification

A Fucking Stupid 100 Hour long servey that is "Required" before you Hack or Cheat on a game that disappoints you and blocks you from becoming a hacker and breaking the limits of how much you can progress in your Video Games.

Joe: I can't wait to Finally hack and break the Limit and give myself 99999999999 Coins!
Computer: Please Complete a Survey To Verify that you are Human.
An Eterinity Later...
Joe: I CAN'T FUCKING DO THIS ANYMORE ELSE MY HEAD WILL EXPLODE AND TO WHOEVER INVENTED HUMAN VERIFICATION SERVEYS...FUCK YOU AND EVERYTHING YOU LOVED!

by HeavySquashedMegaTurtle June 10, 2017