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masturbate

What guys do all the time and girls never admit to doing.
Guy: Come on, everyone does it. Don't be ashamed to admit you masturbate.
Girl: Ew gross, I would never touch myself.
by Peopleplz June 7, 2009
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factsturbate

v: To willfully distort, ignore, or fabricate factual material in order to serve one's selfish ends, e.g. deceiving others
Trump's tendency to factsturbate constantly when speaking to the public makes those with a firm grip on reality swell with anger.
by geblergenschmoof October 20, 2016
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stress masturbate

When one engages in vigorous masturbation as a means of immediate stress relief.
After he was asked to re-do the assignment, Bryce went to stress masturbate before getting down to work.
by Williamsburg Rabbi February 9, 2015
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Masturbate

1) The most pleasurable thing in the entire universe
2)What you do when you're bored and have nothing to do
3)Why Playboys exist
4)To rub or agitate the clitoris, pussy, balls, dick, etc., to gain sexual pleasure
5)Why teenage pregnancies are less frequent
6)What I did before writing this; I got horny reading some of these definitions. By the way, very good material for getting horny. Look up Orgasm, Cum, and Fuck. Very nice ones.
1)Even having 3 orgasms, a blow job, and at least 4 cups of cum go down my throat when i fucked my boyfriend last Friday was not as good as when i masturbate.
2)Hm...... I'm bored. Hey, I know!!! I'll get my old electric toothbrush and masturbate to orgasm. What channel should i put my TV on?
3)I went to the store on the corner and got a Playboy. Now let's masturbate!!!!
4)The year is 1985. I had heard that fuck meant to have sex, and middle finger meant fuck, too. So, I tried combining them!!! I call it, MASTURBATE, or MASTURBATION. I'm sure it'll become popular.

5)Girl 1:With my vibrator, i can masturbate all i want and i can have all the pleasure i want, and i won't get pregnant!!!

Girl 2: But don't you want a baby? I mean, you're already 22.

Girl 1: Hell no!!!!!!!
6)No example, but if you get horny and masturbate to climax.... your welcome.
by IdontKNOWwhatTOdoNOW June 10, 2009
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Fisturbator

An individual that sexually gratifies themselves by self-fisting their own ass. May or may not be performed with a simultaneous wank of the genitals.
Wanking became too mundane for Carl so he turned into a fisturbator to get himself off.
by Eaton Holgoode April 12, 2017
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Masturbate

To beat your dick so fucking hard, your left leg goes numb.
I masturbate every day.
by BillyFuckingBobHadAnalBeads September 25, 2018
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A person who puts on a song and has to masturbate to the beat of the song. The song is usually some sort of edm of electronic music.
Guy 1: what should we do
Girl 1: lets do the masturbate to the beat challenge !

Guy 1: sounds great!
by your majesties sogginess February 28, 2017
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