Magic Carpet Ride

Getting eaten out by a dude with a beard.

My boyfriend never shaves when he's on vacation. I hope I get a magic carpet ride!

by Siouxsie Supertramp July 9, 2021

Carpet Baby

When a baby is conceived by semen picked up off of the carpet. Often done by the "scooting method" where the male ejaculates onto the carpet and then the female scoots her vagina across the semen-covered area.

Ethan's insecurities arose upon the discovery that he himself was a carpet baby.

Oooo that boy is so fine I’d have his carpet babies!

by bobsagetlover1 August 9, 2010

carpet custard

the semi-dry gelatinous goo found on the floor by your other half's PC, usually amongst the crumpled tissues.

wtf's all that carpet custard doing there? I just cleaned this fucking floor you wanker!

by UKP August 21, 2010

carpet snorter

Slang term for a cocaine addict who has dropped their blow onto the carpet.

I have hung out with many a carpet snorter in my day.

by Dr Bunnygirl July 6, 2020

F Carpet Bomb

Like f-bomb, this is a euphemism for saying "fuck" but with added the twist of drawing the word out in length.

Guy #1: What the fuuuuuuuuuuck?!
Guy #2: Nice f carpet bomb.

by ookami80 March 7, 2009

Cum Carpet

A female's jizz-covered pubis mons, unshaved.

I blasted a hot load on Brittany's cum carpet last week!

by JungleVIP August 20, 2013

Greasy Carpet

A middle aged man's anus that hasn't been wiped or cleaned in a decade.

Stanley wiped his greasy carpet on Noelle yesterday.

by The Gay Mankini November 21, 2018