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Tool

One of the most talented and influential progressive rock bands of the past couple of decades. Formed out of Los Angeles in 1990 by vocalist Maynard James Keenan, guitarist Adam Jones, drummer Danny Carey, and bassist Paul D'Amour (later replaced by Justin Chancellor during the process of recording AEnima, the band's 2nd studio album) Tool has defied normalcy since the begining of their existence and despises tool's, hence the bands name "Tool", however the band claims they got the name from Maynard, saying that they wanted to, "bring out to the toolshed and beat some sense into him." for more information, visit the band's website or wikipedia
by jakefst October 30, 2008
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Tool

That one guy with the tribal arm tattoo and does everything that maxim and mens health tells him to do. We all know this guy!
Remember that week when spinning rims were cool? yeah he had them , yeah john is still wearing his collar all the way up what a Tool!!
by GorrilaVich June 27, 2008
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Tool

One, Usually a man, who is a loser, but nobody really bother to tell him to get lost. A tool typically wears clothing from Aeropostale, Hollister, Abercrombie, and or American Eagle. A tool usually (but not always) makes 1st grade jokes, is stupid, Has an ear pierced, or is just annoying. A tool is usually used for people to "borrow" money from. The tool sometimes KNOWS he is buying his friends: A loser.
"Micheal is such a tool."
Or
Micheal: "I know why I'm getting F's. I haven't been laid in weeks! I better go to American Eagle"
Or
"I put my iPod in my pocket and it went through the wash. I better go ask best friend Micheal for some money."
by The Felmale John Lennon September 25, 2009
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Tool

1. Something that is used to assist with the modification of an object or situation.

2. Something that is used to create or destroy.

3. Slang synonym for the males sexual reproduction whatsit.

4. Someone who does seemingly silly things; often used as a term of endearment, but not always!
I am a tool because I have been used to:
Improve someones ego;
Distract them from the mediocrity of their own existance;
Make someone else jealous;
To improve someones elses relationship (how bizarre);
To get them a valentines day present (this year)

For love.
For happiness.
For laughter.

To do everything for them, and in return:
To accept all of the guilt.
To hold all of the pain.
To take all of the blame.
(It was never a game).

A good tradesman respects his tools!!


A Hammer is a tool both used to create and to destroy.

My penis is a somewhat rusty tool I must admit (only from lack of use!!).

I hit my penis with a hammer while making pancakes (as you do)
That sure modified the fuck out of both the objects involved and the situation:
I created a lot of pain
I destroyed the pancake batter (all over the floor), and my willy - must admit i chipped a bit off of the hammer handle too!!

I hit my tool with a tool; I am such a tool

I do not regret being a tool - my penis however has a somewhat different (slanted) view on the subject

Sunday 02/11/2008
by Luke Warm December 22, 2008
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Tool

Someone who does not question social conventions. Someone who is easily influenced by government, politicians, TV, society, etc. Tools tend to be close-minded individuals.
Matt is such a tool.
by DevonGates April 26, 2016
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Tool

1.) One who tries too hard to ingratiate themselves to others, in order to be liked, or to get votes.

2.) Most politicians.
1.) Larry told me what a great job I'm doing again today. He is such a tool.

2.) Congressman (Mark) Green (R-WI) will say anything to get some buzz about his campaign for governor. What a tool!
by Peugeotjoker May 13, 2005
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Tool

An individual (typically sheltered white suburban kids from upper middle class families) who feels that they need to follow all the latest trends and fads religiously, and pretend to be someone they're not in order to be accepted by others, making themselves look like complete idiots. Similar to sheeple.
Tool: "I was camping outside the apple store the night before the latest Iphone release, and my man-bun fell out, so I had to put on my fedora #badhairday"
by A WHITE GUY June 13, 2017
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