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Facebook fuktwat

A poser jackass who posts stuff on facebook just for likes or any form of attention eg " its a beautiful day, hope everyone's enjoying the weather". Will also post anything pretending to lead a glamorous, fun filled, extensively traveled life with a prestigious job. In reality, he's just a blue collar, hourly paid, loser who spends all his time on facebook lurking and stalking. He lives in bumfuck America, but uses foreign phrases and spelling hoping people will think that he spends so much time abroad he's forgotten the American ways. He joins pages of professional organizations and the like, when in reality he holds no real degree or professional license of any sort. Will have hundreds of friends usually of the opposite sex but has never spoken or communicated with them. Will use other people's friends lists to shop for friends of the opposite sex. His friends list looks like it's a mail order bride catalog or listings from Back Page because those are usually the only type of people who accept his friend requests. Spends hours tagging other's pix but has none of his own (because it would reveal his true lame ass life). Posts updates about going to the gym, but is a lard ass who looks like he's never set foot in one. On the whole, he's someone you immediately regret friending. A true douche bag fraud.
Did you see the latest post by the Facebook fuktwat? Evidently he thinks " American gyms are shite. Full stop!". What a stalker douchebag!
by Fuktwathater April 11, 2015
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Facebook Paradox

The paradox you find yourself in when you want to up-vote a social media item that has a sad or negative subject. . You merely want to bring the post to attention of your social network but you question whether someone will misunderstand why you are clicking "like/+1/thumb-up/up-vote/etc"
I struggle with the Facebook Paradox. do I click LIKE to share this news feed item, "'Clumsy the Clown' tragically falls from balcony to his death at children's birthday party." Why isn't there a DISLIKE button? Or a button for MEH?
by Rob G. aka theTexasWolf October 7, 2015
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facebook crazy

When someone is so cought up in other people's drama that they loose track of their own life.
She lost her kids when she went Facebook crazy.
by Bitteroldwife October 16, 2015
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facebook awake

When you are awake enough to engage in social media but not yet ready to get out of bed & face the real world (Facebook awake)
Great party last night , feeling it today though . Stayed in bed until noon but was (facebook awake) since 9:00
by Yolo4ever October 4, 2016
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facebook lice

Trolls that put a full assault on a Facebook post.
Dude, your post is infested with Facebook lice!
by Douggers67 September 2, 2016
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facebook and chill

Same as netflix and chill, but at the end the only pleasure is self-administered.
Ever since I got dumped I just Facebook and chill before going to sleep
by JewDoc2 July 3, 2016
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facebook nanny

When one of your co-workers is also your friend and they feel the need to tell your manager what you're posting on Facebook about work.
"Did you see what Emily posted on Facebook?! I saved it and sent it to our manager!" "Omg! You're such a Facebook nanny!"
by BrassBurns June 24, 2016
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