roast goals

BITCH STFU.You are not at all sexy.In fact,you're a fuckpuppet.
My idea of a perfect Monday afternoon is watching a midget ram your colon.Know why you have polio?Because you're a dickless wookie lover.Heavens to Betsy you loathsome whale fucker,why does your whole house smell like ass?
Go get fucked by a yeti.Gargle a cup of ass juice you cum sponge.
You're cool.And by cool,I mean unsightly.I hope some hobo porks you in the hole until you can't pee standing up,you spelunking anus explorer.Wow you're gorgeous.Just kidding,you're a seal clubber.Why don't you go braid your pubic hair,you dumb cum fountain.My idea of a superb Friday morning is watching a convict rape in your ear.And my two personal favorites;Drink a pint of vaginal discharge,brofessor.Holy flying fuck,you fucking queef.Go get teabagged by a gorilla in a damp alley.

My roast
Roast goals

by It's Harambe November 27, 2016

SMIRT goal

Specific
Measureable
Impossible
Relevant
Time- bound

That sounds like a SMIRT goal rather than a SMART one

by CWimby March 1, 2023

shark couple goals

When a couple mimics the behavior of sharks with each other. For example, at the end of a long day when they are sleepy and play the sleepy shark. Or when they want to surprise the other one, and play the surprise shark.

Look at them, shark couple goals

by surprise shark October 19, 2024

goal angel

Term used to describe soccer goalies who go to exceptional lengths to save the ball.

Teammate: “David was a real goal angel last night. He had 13 saves!”

by AkiraSJW7 November 9, 2020

Own goal

Changing your own news descriptor from “alleged rapist” to “actual rapist”.

The verdict on actual rapist, Bruce Lehrmann’s two counts of rape in Toowoomba, Queensland have yet to be passed down. (Example for “own goal”)

by grimjimslim April 15, 2024

Tas Goals

Tas Goals is more than goals, its amazing. It's the best thing that you can see or do.

"Hey have you seen Susan's new shoes?" "Yeah they're Tas Goals!'

by gossip girl 108 October 14, 2015

goals

When your best friend is going to marry but your friends and you are poor so the party before getting marry are all of your friends with a d**k in the head and d**k balloons singing in the street lights on by shawn mendes

My party before getting marry is going to be goals I'm going to wear a d**k in my head and sing shawn mendes songs in the middle of the night with my best friends

by la payne October 15, 2017