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German Shrapnel

Step one: Invite a bitch and an enemy to your house. Make sure enemy arrives one hour after girl does.

Step two: Feed bitch dinner consisting of excessively spicy Indian, Mexican, Jamaican food and a bag of dried apricots.

Step three: Go to the front door and ass pound that bitch like you're a gorilla on Viagra.

Step four: when enemy arrives open the door and then quickly jump out of the away. Revel in glorious revenge as that diabolically spicy shit rocket explodes in enemies FACE. Enjoy a hearty chuckle as that ass hat loses his dignity, his eye sight, and suffers third degree burns as the molten shit melts his face off!
guy 1: remember Jeff?
Guy 2: you mean the guy that stole your pack of gum?
Guy 1: Yes. Lets just say certain steps were taken and he no longer enjoys the luxury of having a face
Guy 2: *shocked silence*
Guy 1: Yes thats right. He endured the burning turd torpedo that is the german shrapnel
by Raging mountain goat March 22, 2010
mugGet the German Shrapnelmug.

german blockade

When you "bust a nut" onto a person's eye while they are asleep, so when they wake up, their eye is blocked from dried semen.
"I'm going to give Billy a German Blockade when he's asleep, because he teabagged me"
by roflzorz November 18, 2007
mugGet the german blockademug.

german helmet

The highly distinctive helmet used by Germany during WWII. Worn by both Wehrmacht and SS units throughout the war. Even today, the site of one of these pieces of pressed steel can cause piss to run down the legs of Pollacks and Frenchmen everywhere.
I wore my german helmet whilst stealing potatoes from the Irish.
by Swedish Bob November 9, 2006
mugGet the german helmetmug.

Zee Germans

It is actually a term used to make fun of how Germans speak english.

"Zee" is the inability of Germans to enunciate the 'th'.
Hans-Dieter: "Zee Lederhosen were so tight JA, I could not feel zee schnitzel änymore!"

Klaus:"Scheiss mich an, du Sau!"

Trevor: "Did you hear what Zee Germans said?!

Mike: They are not German, they're frickin' idiots!!!"
by Zee Hermantor May 9, 2006
mugGet the Zee Germansmug.

German Bombardier

The act of swinging on a chandelier, while wearing flight goggles, grabbing your penis as if controlling an airplane, making plane noises, and dropping a mad duce directly upon your woman below you.
by Af0rest0fAsh August 24, 2010
mugGet the German Bombardiermug.

german sausage

A very miniscule and inadequate object often mistaken for a penis.

German condom brands such as Fromm, Masculan, Billy Boy, Condomi & Ritex are all produced in smaller sizes.

'Too big' was the pronouncement of the Munich magazine Focus, in a recent article about German genitalia. Sadly for the men implicated, the article was talking about the size of standard European condoms, not the men who wear them. In 1996, in order to promote economic & cultural exchange throughout Europe, the European Union decided upon a standard size of condom - 6.63 inches in length & a range of 1.7 to 2.2 inches in width, to be exact.

A study conducted by the German condom manufacturer Condomi found that the standard European condom fell off of half of the German men polled. The average German penis is about 3.5 to 4 millimeters (0.13 to 0.15 in.) too narrow for the standard EN 600 condom, said the magazine, proving once & for all that size really does matter." ('Germans too small for condoms?' J A Getzlaff. Salon Mon. 6 Mar 2000. salon.com/2000/03/06/condoms_4/)
German sausage only comes in a small package.
by Jess talis September 1, 2014
mugGet the german sausagemug.

German Handkerchief

The act of defecating into the oral cavity of another person, covering the mouth until the person sneezes, and shit runs down their nose. Then you wipe the shit off with your scrotum .
Man I'm still blowing shit out my nose from that German Handkerchief you gave me last night.
by Burito March 31, 2008
mugGet the German Handkerchiefmug.

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