Jesus Card

When I say I pulled out the Jesus card: I have just done something almost impossible or something shouldn't have happened. (Got lucky as hell)
by Lore_boi October 26, 2020
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Jesus Card

When someone justifies their frowned-upon, or even illegal, actions by comparing themself to Jesus disobeying the Roman Empire by spread his beliefs. The general idea is that if Jesus was doing the right thing by broke the law in order to spread the word of god, then it is already for them to break the law in order to <insert action here>.
"Sure, its illegal, but did that stop Jesus when the Romans said his mission was illegal???"
*off to the side*
"Holy shit, he pulled the fuckin' Jesus Card!!"
by Xavien35449510 February 03, 2024
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Just jesus june

Sixth month of Sigma year. If you made it this far than it means you are halfway through the Sigma year, congrats! You mastered your emotions and looking better than ever before and remember, Jesus is watching.
Mike:"James is going to church now?! Just jesus june is doing wonders for him i guess"
by chorbet November 15, 2022
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emilia the son of jesus

emilia the son of jesus is one of a kind, they r born out of a cows udders and are very rare they also worship pitbull
emilia the son of jesus came out of a cows udder
emilia the son of jesus was going out
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João De Jesus

João De Jesus is the most amazing person you'll ever meet, when he comes into your life he will be ur highest point and only take you higher. He has a 11 incher and going strong, He's caring and the sweetestperson you'll ever meet, curious about the world and all the cultures and histories and fucken smexxxxy in a hoodie. Has multiple pink florida shorts and even though he acts gay and retared he isn't ( the game part), he loles to work on himslef and fet better and gives back to the community, may or may not be racists, he comforts well and is understanding

He has a beautiful soul and a beautiful at of seeing life and will open u up so many new experiences, he will be the best thing that will ever happen to you.
Jack : " if João De Jesus was gay id hit that"
Bob : " nah he's just a little dyslexic, but he's the best person you'll ever know"
by He's my world March 27, 2024
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João De Jesus

João De Jesus is the most amazing person you'll ever meet, when he comes into your life he will be ur highest point and only take you higher. He has a 11 incher and going strong, He's caring and the sweetestperson you'll ever meet, curious about the world and all the cultures and histories and fucken smexxxxy in a hoodie. Has multiple pink florida shorts and even though he acts gay and retared he isn't ( the game part), he loles to work on himslef and fet better and gives back to the community, may or may not be racists, he comforts well and is understanding

He has a beautiful soul and a beautiful at of seeing life and will open u up so many new experiences, he will be the best thing that will ever happen to you.
Jack : " if João De Jesus was gay id hit that"
Bob : " nah he's just a little dyslexic, but he's the best person you'll ever know"
by He's my world March 27, 2024
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Jesus spizzim

Yo dude, I tried not to cum, but Jesus spizzim happened, what do I do?
by Kachowism August 11, 2024
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