Waking up to active morning sex to find someone you would not have chosen to have sex with had you been sober.
by Deckard253x May 20, 2020
Get the Surprise? Jesus!mug. 
The Fandom of the boy group BTS is called ARMY and some of them made the term "Jesus would be an army". If Jesus would still be alive, he would definitely be an army, because nobody can resist BTS.
by KIMCHIENTERTAINMENT June 19, 2020
Get the Jesus would be an armymug. Merry Christmas to all! I tell you a little about me.
I fucking loathe the Whore of Babylon Sarah for trying to steal Leon from me (I will never allow that in infinity years! Leon's is mines bitch!), but jokes on her, I got guns and U.S military experience. But anyways, I have fought in the Gulf War, Iraq and Afghanistan War, and have been stationed in many countries, including Germany, Japan, Guam, among many others. I have also met President Joe Biden and voted for him (still support Joe Biden btw).
I am a bisexual, but I have met my one true love, Leon. He is everything I want in a man, and makes me feel complete. I'm also Latina and my parents for some reason named me Jesus Christ, but hey, I love the name.
I'm a total butch girl and I like all things tough (I love my Ford F-250 truck!) and love America like no tomorrow. I also love guns and have quite a collection. I fight like nails! Black belts in all martial arts you can think of, and have some experience in Special Ops. I also lift bro.
I fucking loathe the Whore of Babylon Sarah for trying to steal Leon from me (I will never allow that in infinity years! Leon's is mines bitch!), but jokes on her, I got guns and U.S military experience. But anyways, I have fought in the Gulf War, Iraq and Afghanistan War, and have been stationed in many countries, including Germany, Japan, Guam, among many others. I have also met President Joe Biden and voted for him (still support Joe Biden btw).
I am a bisexual, but I have met my one true love, Leon. He is everything I want in a man, and makes me feel complete. I'm also Latina and my parents for some reason named me Jesus Christ, but hey, I love the name.
I'm a total butch girl and I like all things tough (I love my Ford F-250 truck!) and love America like no tomorrow. I also love guns and have quite a collection. I fight like nails! Black belts in all martial arts you can think of, and have some experience in Special Ops. I also lift bro.
"Why do you like Joe Biden Jesus?" - Some random friend
"Because he reminds me of my Dad!" - Female Jesus Christ
"Because he reminds me of my Dad!" - Female Jesus Christ
by JesusIsLeon'sGirlfriend December 24, 2023
Get the Jesusmug. by THARSHEBLOES March 12, 2025
Get the Jesus christmug. i spelld jesus chris twrpng dajmmit
by hannahahnahah October 29, 2019
Get the jesus chfistmug. by MUGlol69 October 10, 2021
Get the Black Jesusmug.