Lap Cunt

You know, like a lap dog, but a pesky, people pleasing, pretensious person. Usually a sexually degenerate female (side piece) that just KEEPS. COMING. BACK. No matter how hard you hit them with a rolled up newspaper.

You need to wake the fuck up and treat me with the respect i deserve, I am NOT one of your fucking lap cunts.

by Daskoon August 27, 2022

Lap Smoothie

The inevitable end result of a lap dance on/from a virgin(s).

It was the kid's first lap dance which ended in a lap smoothie.

by McMorty March 17, 2021

naked lap

In any sport or game where someone gets skunked or fails to put up any points on the board, they must take all their clothes off and run a lap around the house naked

Yo Danny got 3 stocked in every match in Super Smash Bros, now he’s gotta take a naked lap around the apartment complex!

Bro you didn’t make a single basket in our 1 on 1 basketball game, get those clothes off and start running your naked lap.

by ChunkyBenis October 6, 2022

Lap Creep

A small animal usually a designer dog who constantly sits on someone's lap.

Geeze Tuttie , can't I sit down without you on my lap? You are a little lap creep!

by Uglyduckling November 29, 2014

lap daddy

A DILF dad who’s lap you would like to sit on. MAINLY FOR SEXUAL REASONS. For example, think of Bella’s dad from Twilight. There’s a scene where his girlfriend is sitting on his lap and he’s a total lap daddy.

Used in a sentence: “Give me that lap you lap daddy.” Also: “is this lap daddy’s lap taken?”

by Organic potting mix January 15, 2022

urethra lapping

a female licking the urethra of a penis to generate more semen which can be an antidepressant.

The housewife was urethra lapping her historical husband to up her well-being.

by Coop Dupe June 16, 2018

Take a Lap

What you tell someone to do when they think they're hot shit.

When some twat is showing off: "Easyy hero, go take a lap."

by An Ex-PuckFuckAndChuck April 24, 2009