PerthTard

(noun, slang, mildly affectionate/derogatory):

A person who has moved to Perth, seemingly vanishing off the face of the Earth and abandoning their friends in the process. Often spotted basking in sunshine, embracing a slower pace of life, and pretending time zones are a valid excuse for never replying to messages.

"Did you hear about Ben?"
"Yeah Ben's a real PerthTard"

by WetLad69 March 22, 2025

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Perth Pokies

A species of gambling machine rumoured to exist west of the Nullarbor, but actually rarer than a FIFO bloke who doesn’t own a jet-ski. In Perth, the only “pokies” you’ll find are scratchies from the servo—tiny cardboard disappointment tiles you frantically scrape like a desperate tradie trying to remove evidence before the missus gets home.

Unlike the rest of Australia—where pubs are basically childcare centres for adults who love button-mashing—Perth bans pokies everywhere except the casino. So locals make do with scratchies

“Due to financial hardship, Darren reports he spent his last $12 on Perth pokies—aka scratchies from the BP—stating that ‘if Centrelink won’t give me a bonus, maybe the cardboard will,’ which was assessed as not a valid income stream.”

by SDSyd December 10, 2025

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