A "Crusty Ger" is a phenomenon known to most as what causes the “sleep” or “eye crusties” you may have around your eyes in the morning. “Sleep” is a type of “rheum”, which is the name for discharge from your nose, mouth or eyes during sleep as a result of a dust buildup and lack of blinking during sleep. More specifically, eye rheum is known as “gound”.
In recent years the reduction of dust particles in the average home due to improved living conditions has reduced the risk of this "sleep" building up around ones eyes.
However, unfortunately this void in eye ejaculation has been replaced by what are known as "Crusty Gers". A man from a small town in Athy, Ireland, known to some as Ger Kelly (most likely an alias for a much older man from the same area), is considered the main culprit for a resurgence in the occurrence of crusty eyes. He is rumoured to enter the homes of friends and strangers alike in an effort to ejaculate in their eyes as they sleep. The events are perhaps a religious, meditative or ritualistic act, but are most likely the blind and reckless actions of a bitter old man with a fetish for deranged crime.
Recent (blurred) sightings of the suspect have been reported in and around the city of Shanghai, China.
In recent years the reduction of dust particles in the average home due to improved living conditions has reduced the risk of this "sleep" building up around ones eyes.
However, unfortunately this void in eye ejaculation has been replaced by what are known as "Crusty Gers". A man from a small town in Athy, Ireland, known to some as Ger Kelly (most likely an alias for a much older man from the same area), is considered the main culprit for a resurgence in the occurrence of crusty eyes. He is rumoured to enter the homes of friends and strangers alike in an effort to ejaculate in their eyes as they sleep. The events are perhaps a religious, meditative or ritualistic act, but are most likely the blind and reckless actions of a bitter old man with a fetish for deranged crime.
Recent (blurred) sightings of the suspect have been reported in and around the city of Shanghai, China.
"Awh man I can barely open my eyes this morning with all this gunk around them!"
"Youve got a serious case of the crusty gers dude, you'd wanna get onto interpol about the shit! He took out a whole hostel in China last night! The fcker!"
"Youve got a serious case of the crusty gers dude, you'd wanna get onto interpol about the shit! He took out a whole hostel in China last night! The fcker!"
by athy credit union November 1, 2013
Get the crusty gersmug. The sexual act of licking a butt hole with hardened poop leftovers. Often staining the teeth or giving bad breath.
Guy 1: Yo how did last night go with your girl?
Guy 2: It was awesome she gave me a crusty softener, now i feel so clean and she definitely needs a new tooth brush.
Guy 2: It was awesome she gave me a crusty softener, now i feel so clean and she definitely needs a new tooth brush.
by psycho_words March 15, 2011
Get the Crusty Softenermug. by A Southall May 23, 2018
Get the crusty earmug. by O and A pest from AZ February 5, 2015
Get the crusty sideburnsmug. by Mafrackincrackin October 15, 2015
Get the crusty glovemug. When a chick with a tracheostomy is blowing you and she inhales right when you come and the spooge comes out her throat hole and dribbles on your nuts. It's a crusty bagpipe with tartar sauce if there's boogers in it.
by analangus December 5, 2017
Get the crusty bagpipemug. by RobsWorldIRL April 14, 2022
Get the Crusty Muppetmug.