functionally Amish

The condition of being clueless about technology.

She can't figure out how to open her e-mail; she's functionally Amish.

by xxoomom February 8, 2010

Socially Amish

When a person has no social media or a cell phone.

Sarah: Can I have your number?
Bob: Sorry, I don't have a cell phone. I'm socially Amish.
Sarah: Do you have Facebook?
Bob: No

by babyhuey121794 October 8, 2013

Socially Amish

When a person has no social media or a cell phone.

Sarah: Can I have your number?
Bob: Sorry, I don't have a cell phone. I'm socially Amish.
Sarah: Do you have Facebook?
Bob: No

by babyhuey121794 October 8, 2013

Old Amish

The act of squirting chocolate milk into your mouth, then taking a swig of milk directly from the udder of a milk cow, and shaking it back and forth to make chocolate milk in your cheeks.

"I've naught time for thine cup nor thine spoon, but Glladys, mine milking cow serves me well for making the Old Amish as dessert, once."

by Erogenous Bosch August 5, 2022

Riding an Amish Surfboard

Titty-fucking your flat chested 2nd cousin.

Also known as Amish Surfboarding

I’m going to a family reunion next weekend and chances are I’ll end up riding an Amish Surfboard.

by Buford Turnipseed June 27, 2019

Amish mistake

May be abbreiviated as "Amish". Something incredibly stupid that occurs to spoil an otherwise perfect situation. After an Amish custom of leaving deliberate skips in the pattern of quilts, lest a perfect design make the Almighty jealous.

When we drove to Scotland for the weekend, my forgetting to fill the tank before going about the Highlands was the Amish mistake of the outing.

by Fearman August 7, 2007

amish porn

A non-sexual picture of a woman with legs exposed above the knee.

Prude: "This picture is inappropriate!"

Reasonable person: "Yeah honey, no more posting amish porn ;)"

by L1ght May 30, 2014