Date-Time Continuum

A span of time in the future equal to the current length of a relationship. For a relationship 6 months long, the Date-Time Continuum's event horizon lies 6 months in the future.

Violating the Date-Time Continuum by making plans beyond the event horizon is ill-advised and stands to cause the relationship to explode in a dazzling supernova of animosity or collapse into a blackhole of mutual loathing.

Ted: "Stella and I are going to her sister's wedding in 6 months"

Barney: "Wait, how long have you and Stella been dating?"

Ted: "3 months"

Barney: "Dude, bad idea. You can't make any plans with Stella for anything more than 3 months in the future. Don't risk violating the Date-Time Continuum."

by Kamputer July 20, 2010

Waste of Time

looking up "waste of time" on UD

I am wasting my time right now.

by you want to know who wrote this that badly? July 5, 2005

time kompression

Shoving your dick into a guy's ass and seeing how long it stays hard

Hey Jim, wanna do some Time Kompression at my place?

by Ultimecia September 28, 2013

Time Vampire

A person who finds creative ways to needlessly waste his/her friends time. Normally done during working hours, and involves elaborate, tedious and often ambiguous messages or tasks that need to be deciphered. 10 out of 10 times, it turns out to be utter nonsense.

OMG, Fraser sent us another one of his bloody cryptic messages. How he has any friends, I don't know, because he is such a fucking Time Vampire.

by Everyone Hates Fraser August 21, 2018

v-time

stands for "vag time"(sex)

Mike: Hey i gotta go bro.
Jamie: Why man?
Mike: It's v-time man.
Billy: Daaammnnn I gotta get me some of that.

by c0ck r0cka November 6, 2007

slow time

For those living in Alabama, on the Georgia/Alabama border, slow time has the same meaning as Central Daylight Time, or Central Standard Time. It is used to differentiate which time zone is being used when communicating with somebody who may be using the different adjacent time zone.

I am going to the club. I will be there at 8 o'clock slow time.

by RentMan December 7, 2009

Rupe Time

A form of time invented by the great Ted Rupe. Usually much slower than anyone elses.

Ted: I'll be there in 15 minutes
Tom: In Rupe time or regular time?
Ted: Regular
*30 minutes later* Tom: Must have been Rupe time.

by Jabraham April 12, 2010