Closet Douche

That one person who has the uncanny ability to partake in douchery but does not exibit all the qualities of a typical douche, leading some people into the illusion that this person is not in fact a douche. In many cases a closet douche is only a douche to guys so oblivious girls think hes a cool guy, adding to the hatred of him. Also, creatine is used by certain closet douches to artificially bulk them up, but everyone knows it just shrinks their ballsack.

guy: "God damn Bob is such a douche"
oblivious girl: "No he's not, he's really a nice guy and he's so muscular."
guy: "No he definatly is, it's just he's just a huge closet douche."

by DD6969 January 19, 2010

closet exhibitionist

closet freak. someone who seems nice but is really secretly naughty or a sex freak

Shay is a closet exhibitionist. She's a lady in the streets but a freak in the bed.

by TresGorgeous July 21, 2006

Closet Queen

A very nice or expensive guitar that never gets played.

Have you seen Bob's 57 gold top? It's so sweet but he never plays it. It's a closet queen.

by Comanche June 13, 2012

Closet Fascist

Closet Fascist- Someone who claims to be a republican, but when that person speaks he/she resembles Hitler.

Joe Wurzelbacher-"To be honest with you, I don't think journalists should be anywhere allowed war . I liked back in World War I and World War II, when you'd go to the theater and you'd see your troops on the screen and everyone would be real excited and happy for them," this means Joe Wurzelbacher is a "Closet Fascist"

by Ken Bluth March 11, 2009

Closet Communist

1.) A very derisive term for a Democrat that would otherwise be described as a "Bleeding Heart Liberal."

2.) Someone who is entirely too left-wing for their own good.

'Joe is so in love with Barack Obama's policies that he may as well be a Closet Communist..."

by msbae June 30, 2012

closet case

1) A homosexual that denies or hides being gay.

2) A person that has not yet come out of the closet.

Look at Jimmy, all those highlights in his hair...dancing around like a fairy. He is such a closet case.

Wow, Jimmy told me he has a crush on Andrea...bullshit! that boy is such a closet case, can't he just come out already?

by Fujiforker March 9, 2008

closet ho

A girl who is portrayed to be innocent, untouched, quiet, and/or shy but is secretly crazy, adventurous, and sometimes promiscuous, specifically when around the opposite sex (or same sex, depending on the girl's preference).

That quiet girl in our math class is actually a closet ho outside of school, despite her seemingly innocent and naive appearance.

by sarcasticandsweet January 25, 2011