Harrisburg Christian school

There’s lots to unpack here. This is a school for a bunch of rich white assholes who like to stay in their white bubble of Christian-ness. Everyone thinks they’re the shit, but in reality, people in the real world who go to normal public schools laugh at these dweebs. Our diversity rating, negative percent. With some pervs, fossils, cat grandmas who can’t tell they’re super cringe, and subs who can’t self tan as teachers, you’ll have an interesting experience to say the least.

Person 1: did you hear about that school, Harrisburg Christian school?
Person 2: ewww they’re a bunch of losers haha

by Crazy_rat_johnson July 8, 2023

Plymouth Christian Academy

Alright, I'm a student here. I'm gonna give a serious definition for this godforsaken hellhole. This place is poison. I can't put into words how much trauma and pain I've experienced here. The people are assholes and have no morality or tolerance except for "Jesus is cool and if you don't like him you're gonna die a terrible death and regret being not Christian for the rest of your life". The class program is a joke, with 7th graders only having 5 electives and only getting to choose 2. Every class you take somehow turns into a Bible lecture no matter what subject. Almost all of the people that go here are awful people and only care about "being the best Christian I can be". I'm going to take a minute to say that not ALL of the school is terrible, some teachers have a sense of humor and actually try to educate you on something other than God and Jesus or whatever. I want to say at least some of the kids know what the word 'tolerance' means, but that's a bit of a stretch. This school houses, creates and encourages the stereotype of (white) insane Christians who hurt other people who aren't (white) like minded-Christians. Again, I can't stress enough how intolerant the people here are towards others who have a different faith or lifestyle. This school is just an expensive prison. If you want to use "Plymouth Christian Academy" in a sentence, DON'T. Find a similar word, like "hell" or "pain", or even "death-inducing traumatic prison". Please, I beg of you, stay away.

"Oh yeah, Zoey goes to Plymouth Christian Academy."
"Oh, that poor girl. I hope she escapes someday."

by @ch7@ July 13, 2023

Columbus Christening

Originally from Columbus, Ohio, this act involves dumping a concoction of BBQ sauce and semen (preferably human) onto someone's head, simulating a Baptism.

"My girl wanted to feel like a born-again Christian, so I gave her the ol' Columbus Christening."

by akaRakxm September 28, 2023

Whole christian

A christian who just won't shut up about how jesus is always here, and reminds you more than a group of priests in a line at your door waiting to remind you about jesus. Goes to bible study and has more than enough crucifixes on the wall and jesus statues

Not to be confused with a normal, sane christian.

Person 1: Chandler is totally a whole christian
Chandler: Don't use the word Christian in vain, Jesus will steal your penis so you cannot jerk and sin.

by subway572572 October 28, 2023

American Christian

In simple terms, A fake Christian. This is not exclusive to only Americans but rather a national-neutral term for someone who recognizes that the Bible may have some good teachings but doesn’t actually believe it to be the word of god. Most of these people just believe the Bible is “folklore” or “just a bunch of parables”. But won’t actually do any research on what they are claiming. Essentially just an agnostic or atheist who falsely associates with the Christian spiritual belief. These people are not in touch with their spirituality whatsoever and cling to “ReLigIoNn”. Based on cultural influences, traditionalism and mass deceit of the general population. In fact Jesus tells us to follow him and NOT religion (John 14:6).

Dude did you hear Wyatt is an American Christian? How cringe he should really read the Bible more in-depth.

by occultismDoesntHaveToBeSatanic November 9, 2023

Free Christian

noun = Unitarian.The term Free Christian is used in the name of the British religious denomination’The General Assembly of Unitarian and Free Christian Churches’ to imply that it contains people who are not Unitarian. It does not.

Q Are you a Unitarian?

A I prefer to use the term Free Christian

Q What does that mean?
A Unitarian

by The Thegn of Tottington December 2, 2023

Tiktok Christian

A Christian who learns a false version of Christianity on TikTok.

Person 1: “You saw that new TikTok Christian account that just blew up? He’s promoting racism and homosexuality.”

Person 2: “Yeah, he said that being gay wasn’t a sin in our religion right?”

by mozare January 9, 2024