Cisco Certified Trained Monkey

The Cisco Certified Trained Monkey, or CCTM, is not a technical certification offered by Cisco Systems.

This is a Cisco Certified Internetworking Expert (CCIE) who designs statically routed networks.

A bunch of Cisco certified trained monkeys have ruined my network.

by kootiger June 16, 2017

detecting multiple leviathan class lifeforms in the region. Are you certain whatever you’re doing is worth it?

Following this PDA warning there are two scenarios.

A: you ignore it and shit your pants to a reaper leviathan seconds later.
B: You turn around and your pants get to live another day

PDA: “Detecting multiple leviathan class lifeforms in the region. Are you certain whatever you’re doing is worth it?”

You: “I can’t possibly imagine what could go wro-AHHHHH,SH** YOU CU*T GO F*** YOURSELF, NO NO NO NO NO JESUS.”

Your seamoth: *Dies*
Your pants: *Turn brown*
A hole in your monitor: *Appears*

by CallMeBez April 8, 2023

Certificated

A strange word invented by The Administrator, who has the power to do such things. It means "holding a certificate relating to the fields of aviation or aviation maintenance."

"Certificated!? Is that even a real word?"

by Da Moose November 12, 2003

certainteed

adj.

Certainly gauranteed; guaranteed to be certain; fasho (for sure); no doubt.

Thug: "When are you getting that new car homes?"
Graduate: Next month, son, certainteed.

by Choy Boyeeeeeeee January 10, 2005

Certificate

In School:
-The only thing you get from winning a school event.

-A useless piece of paper you can win and brag about with other students.

Other Situations:
-A piece of paper proving something you have or own is yours.

-Common types are Birth, Marriage and Death.

-I won a certificate at a school competition today, the fuck am I gonna do with this? You think I burnt half of my life in training for this moment only to get this thing?
-Here's a certificate of me winning firsr place. Suck it.

-Dude, that thing is mine, I have proof here, a certificate with specific date and my signature and such...

-I got my birth certificate today now I can apply for this school.

by ~HumanonlySee4gbRam July 2, 2018

certified egirl

an egirl that is certified by the gamer king, and can give out no nut november passes.

"yo did you get that no nut november pass from a certified egirl? cause if not it won't work."

by 9taillllllllllllllllllllllllls November 2, 2019

Google Certified

Knowing everything you can on a specific topic and becoming a professional by using google.

Jessie- I know everything about Parakeets

Siera- Oh really, are you an avian vet?

Jessie- No, Im google certified BITCH

by jkplaymate07 July 12, 2012