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wanker's cramp

British slang:
To wank is slang for masturbating, usually understood to be carried out on a man by someone of either sex.

Wanker's cramp is laughingly used to describe any hand pain, with the understood meaning that the person with the pain often masturbates.
You say your hand hurts. You must have wanker's cramp.
by soreofhing July 6, 2009
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Wankeroo

Wankeroo, Loud mouthed Australian Bankers or Tourists In London
by WBCT September 29, 2010
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shower wanker

A person who says he takes a shower for at least one hour, but actually while he is showering he is casually beating his meat (wanks, gives pleasure to himself).
Yo, Vlad, How long did you shower for in the morning?
Like 2 hours!
You are such a shower wanker, eh!
by wanking December 13, 2016
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Guitar Wanker

A lead guitar player who plays badly, loudly, and repetitively, on a blues or pentatonic scale. A Guitar Wanker uses distortion to cover up a lack of skill and creativity. Guitar Wankers have no idea how to structure a solo, so they jerk around mindlessly and endlessly, until the rest of the band decides to shut them up. Although there are a few rare Guitar Wankers (Clapton, Prince, Santana) who are capable of wanking without being totally boring, Guitar Wankers generally have no structural knowledge of music. Guitar Wankers generally try to copy these players, but they can't distinguish between their own playing and the good stuff. Unlike lead jazz guitarists, who can noodle around without being obnoxious, Guitar Wankers never listen to whatever the rest of the band is doing. Guitar Wankers are always convinced of their own brilliance and talent. In truth, a Guitar Wanker lacks craft and taste, so they can only produce self-interested masturbatory noise.
Ace Frehley: I can't even read notes. But I can teach someone how to make a guitar smoke.
Interviewer: Maybe you should have burned your guitar and learned to read notes, you Guitar Wanker.
by th3sp3c1al1st July 25, 2019
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Corner wanker

1) A person who gives off perverted vibes but are too socially awkward to actually perform any sexual act.

2) A person who stands on the edge of a conversation, occasionally joining in however they never fully contribute to the conversation.
3) A person that gives the impression that they would stand and watch sexual intercourse whilst wanking silently in the corner.
“Omg Alex is such a corner wanker, all he does is stare at girls boobs but he’s never actually had a conversation with anyone”
by Hm0411 February 14, 2020
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Sebastian Walker

Duplicity Harry's real name. He's been betraying all of us all this time...
"Wait what... Harry from Duplicity is actually called Sebastian Walker?"

"Yep. He's had a fake identity before. Now we know his real name."
by julez <3 April 12, 2021
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John Walker Effect

First coined by Twitter user @buggy_con, the John Walker Effect is when in any form of media the writers unintentionally make the antagonist characters

-Far more entertaining
-Far more believable as characters
-More sympathetic

-More heroic than the stale and downright evil protagonists/heroes

Typically you will see the writers project all the things they view as evil onto these characters in order to make a straw man to pit against their oh so perfect protagonists. However, this unintentionally causes these characters to be loved by the audience, for they are the only ones who

-Call out the protagonists' bullshit for what it is
-Have actual ideas and motivations that aren't selfish

These characters often have to be amped up to cartoonish levels of evil in order to try and make the audience root against them.
Rorschach from Watchmen, Tyler Durden from Fight Club, and Colonel Quaritch from Avatar are all examples of villains that suffer from the John Walker Effect.
by janh47 July 23, 2023
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