18 definitions by soreofhing

When an innocent young man is seriously told that masturbation will cause hair to grow on the palms of your hands, he will often immediately look at his hands thus causing raucous laughter from the others.
Did you know masturbation causes hair to grow on the palm of your hand?
by soreofhing July 6, 2009
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Something that wives keep count of when you are at a party.
For example, after a couple of hours laughing and joking with the men, your wife will sidle up to you and say in a very accusing tone of voice "That's your fourth drink, you know".
That's your fourth drink, you know.
by soreofhing July 6, 2009
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What young men are apt to do in cold countries.
It usually consists of sitting and watching young girls and women as they pass, and observing their nipple areas to see if they have pursed up due to the cold, and consequently make a prominent hard bean shape under their tight fitting blouse or tee shirt.
It is a competitive sport and he who legitimately counts the most beans in an agreed time, wins.
I saw a poor girl this morning when I was bean counting with Bob; she was really cold.
by soreofhing July 6, 2009
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A day to commemorate that famous Briton who was born in Banna Venta Berniae, Cumbria, England.
Yet another Englishman who attempted to civilize the Irish.
It's wonderful to think that St. Patrick's Day is spent celebrating another famous Englishman.
by soreofhing August 10, 2009
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I've looked and looked at maps, charts and my world globe but can't find any place called Malvinas in the south Atlantic Ocean.
I can only find some British islands called the Falkland Islands.
I don't think the Malvinas exist at all.
Malvinas? Where are they?
I can't find the Malvinas. I don't think they exist.
Who invented this funny name Malvinas?
by soreofhing November 24, 2009
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Foolish, destructive, evil sect.

I was happily married and had two wonderful little boys.
The mother of my first wife "got religion" with the JWs and then brainwashed her daughter to become one.
As an atheist I accept other's ideas, so I went along with the idea and accepted her going to the JW meetings where she was indocrinated into their ideas. However, at the insistence of her local JWs she started to try and convince me to go and become one if them.
I said that I was happily an atheist and that the bible was written by men not God.
From then on things went from bad to worse and I was officially and publicly declared to be The Devil.

We divorced and I am now happily remarried with two lovely girls.

Jehova's Witnesses directly caused the breakup of my marriage and caused two innocent young boys to be subjected to the pain and loss which now, after 30 years still affects my oldest boy.

Jehova's Witneses are evil fools.
Yes! Open the door to the Jehova's Witnesses and tell those fools that their stupid, evil, ignorant ideas caused the breakup of my happy marriage and that I despise and hate them for it and will never forgive them.

Then tell them to fuck off and slam the door in their face.
by soreofhing July 7, 2009
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