Skip to main content

The Spread Eagle Has Landed

When your sleazy, white trash, welfare-dependant daughter comes back to roost at your home with her five illegitimate children – because she just can’t make ends meet on four handouts alone.

With the cost of everything rising, public assistance from Welfare, Social Security, Food Stamps and Child Support is no longer allowing her to live the way that she had been accustomed – and the single-wide trailer has just been repossessed!

It’s sad, but once the essentials such as cigarettes, beer, drugs, snacks, lottery tickets, magazines and pre-paid cell phone cards are purchased, there never seems to be enough money left over for the non-essentials such as rent, utilities, gas or car repairs.
Man1: I heard that C moved back in with you, with all the kids.

Man 2: Yep, The Spread Eagle Has Landed!
by Politic Ric October 31, 2010
mugGet the The Spread Eagle Has Landed mug.

The Spreading Eagle

When one makes Eagle noises while spreading legs and flapping arms during sexual intercourse.
Hey, do you wanna try the spreading eagle tonight?
oooh, kinky
by Briget Smiles December 3, 2010
mugGet the The Spreading Eagle mug.
Farmer Bob: I just bought a completely restored thirteen letter shit spreader to work the farm"
Farmer Joe: What's that make, 20 IHs you own now?
Farmer Bob: Thirty; there's 10 more out behind the barn I can use for parts... or to build a Doodlebug.
by AmerIHCan May 8, 2010
mugGet the thirteen letter shit spreader mug.

bend and spread

1. verb - The act of bending over and spreading your butt cheeks in someone's face (usually for a rectal visual exam)
Dude, at MEPS I had to do the bend and spread. It was mortifying because the doc was like 70.
by waterleopard December 27, 2011
mugGet the bend and spread mug.

spreading joy

The phrase refers to the process of letting a massive amount of fart gas out in a carefully metered way- usually by farting silently while walking. In this manner, a disasterously huge amount of fart may be discretely dispensed over a larger geographical area. When faced with the prospect of needing to fart in a socially awkward situation, a person often resorts to initially letting a test fart. If the test fart indicates a vile, deadly amount of gas, the person may opt to walk (for example) from the punch bowl across the dance floor, and over to the bar- all the while silently farting the whole way. People at the punch bowl will begin vomiting, the dance floor will clear and the bar area patrons may begin to pass out. Meanwhile, the farter may actually be dozens of feet away, thus escaping blame. In such a way, the farter is said to be "spreading joy."
Damn, Frank is such an idiot. He farted over by the band and kept walking. He's spreading joy all over the wedding reception. How disgusting!
by Frank Klaune September 1, 2005
mugGet the spreading joy mug.

Spreading Crow

Spreading Crow is firmly spreading a hot babes ass cheeks and pounding her pooper.
"oh man, look at that hot chick!", said Brad, "yeah, id spread her crow." said Dan, "I love spreading crow!".
by CrowTime December 15, 2011
mugGet the Spreading Crow mug.

anal spread

A delicious alternative to the bush taco, wherein a solid and juicy shit is spread on bread, toast or eaten with carrots and celery. Intense vommiting may follow.
I have a piece of bread but I have no peanut butter. I do however have anal spread, well I will in about 5 minutes.
by esparagus partridge October 21, 2009
mugGet the anal spread mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email