A material most often used to wipe one's anus clean of fecal matter, generally after one uses a restroom. Can be used for other purposes as well, almost all of which involve a liquid mess that needs to be removed through absorption. A common misconception is that toilet paper is sold on cardboard rolls. The material most people are thinking of in this case is in fact just smaller paper towels. Despite having identical functions to toilet paper, there is a clear distinction: Small paper towels are sold on rolls, toilet paper is sold in four volumes, each with the appearance of a regular book. And on each page of toilet paper can be found many words that were written by Stephanie Meyer.
The words are ignored by most and toilet paper is used for its intended purpose. Some have attempted to read them, though doing so is strongly advised against; no contributions to literature in any form are present. A group of the people who have read the words have developed an obsession with not only reading toilet paper, but with it's empty shells which they believe are characters. They can be witnessed arguing over which of these would make a more desirable boyfriend in real life, and for the other empty shells featured in toilet paper.
The people who do this are best dealt with through tolerance. They probably won't go away for a while. Just keep using it to wipe your ass, because it's much better for that than for reading.
The words are ignored by most and toilet paper is used for its intended purpose. Some have attempted to read them, though doing so is strongly advised against; no contributions to literature in any form are present. A group of the people who have read the words have developed an obsession with not only reading toilet paper, but with it's empty shells which they believe are characters. They can be witnessed arguing over which of these would make a more desirable boyfriend in real life, and for the other empty shells featured in toilet paper.
The people who do this are best dealt with through tolerance. They probably won't go away for a while. Just keep using it to wipe your ass, because it's much better for that than for reading.
Jimmy: Mom, can you hand me some toilet paper through the door? We ran out.
Mom: Sure Jimmy, will New Moon work?
Jimmy: I don't think that's enough, I'm probably gonna use up a whole Breaking Dawn after that crap.
Mom: Sure Jimmy, will New Moon work?
Jimmy: I don't think that's enough, I'm probably gonna use up a whole Breaking Dawn after that crap.
by 20505person March 25, 2013
Get the Toilet Paper mug.Politicians such as Reagan, Bush41,Bush43,Ashcroft etc. seem to think the U.S. Constitution is just Republican toilet paper. They have used the war on drugs and the war on terror as an excuse to take away basic basic constitutional rights. Some examples include the Patriot Act, warrantless wire taps, property seizures etc.
by Mr.Juan-derful August 28, 2010
Get the Republican toilet paper mug.by Neonnight July 7, 2018
Get the Toilet paper seeds mug.Toilet paper is a thin paper substance that people use to wipe their booty
In these times of pandemic all people especially hoarders and karens will buy way to much
Toilet paper is even more sacred then hand sanitizer
Some believe that toilet paper will stop COVID-19 but no they are wrong
In these times of pandemic all people especially hoarders and karens will buy way to much
Toilet paper is even more sacred then hand sanitizer
Some believe that toilet paper will stop COVID-19 but no they are wrong
by Stareintothemaggotdraw March 23, 2020
Get the Toilet paper mug.Corporate Toilet Paper (CTP) - An employee that is irreplaceable, always in demand, impossible to do without, and required by every single other person at work, but is universally looked down upon and has all of the business 'crap' thrust upon them being at a rank too low to refuse it. This person is very intelligent, technical, and often has poor social skills and/or low social standing. A corporate toilet paper is never promoted due to that person's high value in a low position. In many professions this person is female due to a male dominated corporate structure of veiled misogyny.
Mary is this firm's corporate toilet paper. She's the only employee with the skills to handle the difficult 'crap' jobs and they don't promote her because of it. Her boss is an idiot, but he went to college with the president's son.
by Lord Viper Scorpion May 20, 2009
Get the Corporate Toilet Paper mug.When a homo's taking a shit and purposely uses 1 ply so his finger pokes through and he finger pops himself.
by HoodAche November 12, 2007
Get the toilet paper poke mug.by snorgle October 19, 2003
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