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e-maintain

We’ve always conditioned men to maintain women—this isn’t something new. What’s different is this “maintenance” has become completely electronic for some men, and the men doing the “maintaining” aren’t seeing or even making an effort to see the women they are connecting with. Men are just texting, emailing or using social media to give the impression they are checking in or they care—in order to maintain these women.

For these men, the definition of “maintenance” has shifted from traditional strategies like sending gifts and engaging in the occasional dinner, drinks or movie, to this incredibly convenient and empty form of communication based on text messages, emails, and social media: e-maintaining. And it is a mode of communication that isn’t even based in reality.

Coined by Yashar Ali
Since their last night together, Michael kept in touch with Karen on a regular basis. Every couple of weeks, Karen received a text or email from him. The messages always started out the same way, “What’s up?”

Karen would always fill him in on her life, and Michael would always respond with the same short answer, “That’s cool.”

After one or two text messages, Michael would usually disappear. But a couple of weeks later, he would show up again. Sometimes their conversations would go deeper—ten minutes of texting back and forth. Karen would find hope in those longer texting sessions, thinking that he was finally engaging with her.

A couple times he even texted, “We should have dinner soon.”

But every time Karen agreed to dinner, Michael would tell her about his really busy month at work, delaying the need to schedule a real date. Then, he would never follow up.

This faux-relationship wasn’t going anywhere and Karen was left feeling confused and frustrated about Michael’s intentions.

But these sporadic texts weren’t even about sex. Michael never even proposed any sort of rendezvous. And Karen’s motivation was certainly not friendship. “I have enough friends,” she said.

“He’s not even trying to sleep with me, what’s the point of all this?”

I told her, “Karen you’re being e-maintained”
by Caramello October 11, 2013
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Refers to people who are in well-paid, cosy, cushy jobs - who don't actually do any real work but are exceptionally talented at justifying their own worthless jobs, wasting money and making sure that whatever happens their own job stays justified and safe so that they can maintain their own cushy lifestyles. Good at feathering their own nests and shitting in other people's.

Lifestyle maintenance strategists are usually 'precious' but deluded people who highly rate their own value or worth. They'd be laughed off a building or construction site.
Most often represented by non technical managers and executives found in British public sector departments where jobs are not 'proper jobs'; for example Public Health manager or consultant.

Work actvities include Google time; blue sky thinking; journal club; wasting large amounts of tax payers money, running sexual health campaigns that cost £50,000 with an outcome of 19 Chlamydia tests; meetings with lots of nice tea and biscuits about work programmes that last 18 months at which a poster is finally triumphantly produced which could have taken a college student their lunch hour to come up with; the finance available to buy lifestyle designer gadgets and possesions so that they can feel smug and superior - for example owning an electric car or designer boiler; making sure that meetings finish by 4pm so the they can get away to the gym, running club, or fictious Tarquin Tombola's dinner party to which only other lifestyle maintenance strategists are invited. Colluding together (often at Tarquin Tombola's dinner parties or covens) to get rid of employees who are good at their jobs and who might expose them for the lying, worthless sociopaths that they are.
by Sauron's contact lens June 22, 2012
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Related Words
Mairtin mairt mairte Maite Maarten maira mairi mairead maitha Maartje

Maite

A very nice lovable person. She is very very pretty and normaly makes everyone aroun her smile. She is a hard worker and never gives up. She is shy in the beginning but once you know her she never stops talking. She is some what organized an gas a great sense if humor. She loves animals and has a life time goal she wants to achieve .
Maite: hey can you helP me with this report for school?
Teacher: sure , I have time.
by Lizbeth Collin August 8, 2012
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Maireni

Smart, sexy and outgoing. Beautiful inside and out. Gorgeous face, perfect features. Ideal eyes, nose, lips, cheekbones and skin. Lots of curves and super skiny. Traffic stopping beauty. Magnetic. Quick to reply, endearing, fun to be around. Shy in some situations like a baby deer with big doe eyes but like a tiger with sharp claws when provoked. Big heart, courageous.
"Damn that girl is beautiful! She's steppin' out like a Maireni. Owwwwwwwwwwww!"
by mr. weston13 February 4, 2010
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Shaft Maintenance

When you got to clear the weeds, release some finely aged fluids, wax and lube up the shaft.
Person A: Hey bro you free tomorrow?
Person B: Naw bro I got shaft maintenance!
by Bosancheros September 14, 2016
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Mairi

A girl with a unbreakable spirit. Shes a unique character who can always make you laugh. Whatever problems life throws at her none will overcome her. Likes to party loves to dance, shes caring and will always help you out if she can. She can be shy and self conscious with no need to be, but hides it well

also smoking hot!!

toatsamazebaws
hey is that Mairi over there

yeah shes so beautiful, she made me go give blood with her once , i passed out but totally worth it !!
by DanielKreamCracker August 31, 2013
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Percussive Maintenance

The fine art of bludgeoning an electronic device in order to encourage it to work properly. Vigorous usage of this technique often renders said device permanently nonfunctional.
My goddamned monitor was flickering until I used some percussive maintenance; now it's totally dead and Help Desk is bringing me a new one.
by naz_ghul March 14, 2003
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