craniorectal inversion

A state of being usually adopted by middle management types whereby one's head is inserted into one's own arse. Considered to be quite an accomplishment by middle management types, given that their heads are at the same time permanently stuck in the respective arses of upper management types.

Psychologist: "The patient appears to be suffering from a chronic case of craniorectal inversion. What does he do for a living?"
Psych ward Nurse: "He's the manager of the Hospital's Human Relations team. He answers to the Director."
Psychologist: "Say no more."

by Apathetic Care Bear January 31, 2005

rectocranial inversion

Having your head up your ass.

I had a bad case of rectocranial inversion when I did that.

by Bill Kirby August 21, 2003

cranial rectal inversion

nice way of saying you have your head in your ass. also known as H.I.A.S (head in ass syndrome)

"I know that our anniversary was today, but, I was having a cranial rectal inversion and I will make up for it this weekend."

by grant24 May 15, 2008

jailhouse conversion

A sudden shift in belief systems (usually finding Jesus, but also Allah and probably every other Deity) after a period of incarceration. Usually a ploy for leniency with the legal system. Oddly, given the separation of church and state that we're supposed to have in this country, it does sometimes seem to have a positive effect when going to talk to the judge/parole board. Everyone from your local meth dealer to Manuel Noriega, Dictator of Panama have tried this one, making it one of the truly "oldest ones in the book".

typical jailhouse conversion:

Crack Dealer: Your Honor, I found Jesus in the Dade County Jail.

Judge: Big deal, this is Florida, every third guy in there is named Jesus....

by Madmann October 10, 2005

Split conversion

Rarely achieved; when you get that threesome and still get to hit your side chick after.

“Bro, hit that split conversion last night. Becky and Stephaine were the main course and went to Jessica’s after for dessert.”

by Tatted truffle pig September 16, 2023

rectal cranial inversion

having ones head up their ass

that asshole had a serious case of rectal cranial inversion.

by jefbenet November 6, 2003

rectal-cranial inversion

a serious medical condition, wherein your cranium, or brain, has changed places with your rectum, or asshole. it can lead to jail time, unwanted pregnancy, divorce, loss of job and/or income, and public embarrassment.

joey: oh man, i can't believe i broke up with chloe; she's the best thing that ever happened to me. how could i be so stupid?
zoey: you may have been suffering from rectal-cranial inversion. you may still be. consult your psychologist or your proctologist as soon as possible.
joey: thanks, you're a real pal. i guess i need a tractor.
zoey: for what?
joey: to pull my head out of my ass!!
zoey: true dat.

by earpuller May 18, 2006